Loss of a Brother
by bushdana
Summary: Castiel experienced heartbreak long before he came to Earth. When he was a fledgling he lost his brother Lucifer. He grows up with Gabriel and Balthazar and together they form many happy memories, but gradually they leave too, leaving Castiel alone in Heaven.
1. A Fledglings Love

Castiel had run away to his nest after seeing the destruction of Heaven. He had trusted Lucifer, yet his brother had betrayed him. Why hadn't Lucifer just been able to follow his father's instructions? Why must he rebel? Couldn't he see the beauty of humanity and how necessary it was to protect them? Lucifer had destroyed Heaven and injured many of Cas' siblings. Cas was not injured, as he was only a fledgling and didn't fight, but Gabriel had fought at the instruction of Michael and their father. Gabriel had been injured but not as badly as many others as he was an archangel. Although as Gabriel was an archangel, he had grown up with Lucifer and was much closer with him than many other angels who had fought. Balthazar had also fought, although he did so behind Gabriel's back as, like Cas, Balthazar was still a young fledgling with not yet fully developed powers and wings. Because of this, when Gabriel had seen Balthazar fighting, he had spent most of his time and energy trying to protect him. Cas had had no interest in fighting. He didn't want to hurt his siblings. He didn't want to hurt anyone. So he stayed in his nest and covered his ears, trying to forget about the war which was being waged outside.

* * *

As Cas sat, wrapped in his tan trench coat and beautiful black and deep blue wings, he heard a commotion. It was the sound of hundreds of angels jeering and cheering. He snuck out of his nest and ran towards the noise, curious about what could make them do that, after so long of hearing nothing but noises of pain. What he saw broke his heart, and made him wish he had stayed in his nest. Lucifer was being made to walk towards the Pit by Michael. Both of his brothers were injured, the result of the two of them fighting each other. The two strongest and closest brothers in Heaven being forced to fight each other took a heavy toll on them. Michael was walking with a limp and had his wing bandaged. Lucifer was covered in cuts and blood, but what really hurt was the look of pain on Lucifer's face and the absolute coldness on Michael's. The mischievous look which Cas had so often seen on Lucifer's face was gone and the caring eyes and smile which was usually on Michael's face had disappeared.

Gabriel was standing off to the side with Balthazar, both injured and looking heartbroken by what was happening. Cas wondered how this could have all happened. He remembered when he was younger and his brothers would look after him and smile. Lucifer would play with Cas and play pranks on other angels, always laughing when Michael scolded him for setting a bad influence to the younger angels. Michael would look after him and made sure nothing bad happened to him. Gabriel, his caretaker, had been teaching him how to fly and comforted him when he was upset or frustrated. They had been a such a happy family.

Cas could not bear to just stand and watch any longer, so he broke away from the ranks of the angels and ran towards Lucifer. Lucifer stopped short upon seeing him and looked shocked. After all, why would he expect any angel to run towards him and stop his walk towards his inevitable punishment? Lucifer turned towards Michael as if asking for permission and Michael curtly nodded, his face betraying no emotion. Lucifer bent down slowly and Cas came barrelling into him, embracing him in a bone-crushing hug. "I'm so sorry Cas," Lucifer said into Cas' hair, "I never wanted this to happen. I never wanted to hurt anyone."

Cas looked up at Lucifer, his bright blue eyes swimming in tears, "Why'd you do it? Why did you have to fight? We were so happy. I was so happy"

Lucifer could not meet Cas' eyes when he said "I just wanted Father to listen to me. I just wanted him to know that I couldn't love the humans more than him." Lucifer slowly looked up only to see the hurt in Cas' eyes, and he cursed at himself for causing so much pain to his brothers and sisters.

He looked around and saw the damage that he had done. He saw Gabriel and Balthazar, the angels he had sworn never to hurt, leaning on each other in pain. He saw his older brother, Michael, looking ahead, the exasperated but still kind and loving look he usually had for Lucifer gone. Lucifer looked back down and saw that Cas' too large heart had been broken for the first time. And it was all his fault. He had had to rebel. He had destroyed Heaven. He hadn't listened to his father. And in doing so, he had destroyed everything. As Michael cleared his throat, a signal that it was time to move on, Lucifer pulled Cas into a hug, and murmured, "I'm so sorry Cas, I never wanted to hurt you. I love you Cas. Don't ever forget that I love you."

With that Cas pulled away and, quickly grabbed a feather from his wing and shoved it into Lucifer's hand, "So you don't forget about me," he said before turning and running off in a blur of tan and black, the crowd of angels swallowing him up, leaving Lucifer numb at the thought that he would never see his youngest brother again.

Lucifer clambered to his feet and numbly walked towards the hole, holding his last, bittersweet reminder of Heaven tight in his hand. As he fell he kept a firm hold on the feather, and he vowed that for the rest of his life he would never let it leave him, that he would never forget about the young brother with the too large heart who had given it to him.

That was the one promise that Lucifer never broke. He would never forget about Castiel for as long as he lived.

* * *

 **Authors Note:** Hey everyone, I have posted these chapters before but these are all the longer, updated chapters. I will be editing all the chapters and posting the new versions. While I am busy with school now, I will probably just be updating the chapters I've already edited. Hope you all like it and let me know what you think!


	2. Missing you already

**Note:** Hi everyone! Thanks for taking the time to read my story. I hope you like it! I'm not really sure where this is going to go, it's just an idea I had. If you have any suggestions or would like me to write anything specific in this story just let me know! Any reviews would be great!

Gabe had seen Cas run out to say goodbye to Lucifer, however, he hadn't seen where he had gone. Gabe walked with Balthazar through what used to be his home. Heaven had been destroyed by the fighting. The formerly beautiful paradise had been replaced with a new post-apocalyptic land of destruction. Heaven was silent as all the angels had sought solitude to recover from their injuries and process what had happened.

Gabe wandered through the destroyed Heaven, searching for Cas with Balthazar close to his side. Gabe had been the angel who found Cas and he had always felt a fierce sense of protection towards him. Just as Gabe was beginning to lose hope, he heard a muffled cry, which could only belong to one baby angel. He turned to look at his younger brother, Balthazar, who looked older than his young years, with his silver wings folded dejectedly behind him. Balthazar caught Gabe's eyes and together they set off towards the cries.

They soon found Cas tucked up in a nest, with his wings and trench-coat tucked around him. Gabriel's heart broke, seeing his younger brother so upset. He had wanted to protect him from the dangers and heartbreak of the world but he had already failed. "Cas," Gabe asked, "Are you okay?" Upon hearing his older brothers voice Cas flew into Gabe's arms and sobbed into his shirt. "Shhh," Gabe hushed, "It's going to be okay, Cas." Looking at Balthazar, Gabe quietly said, "Let's go back to our nest." Balthazar nodded once and launched into the air. Gabe followed him, clutching Cas tightly.

As they landed in their nest, Gabe prised the now sniffling Cas away from him and laid him gently down. Balthazar laid down next to Cas and Gabe laid on the other side, spreading his great golden wings over his brothers.

Gabe looked at Cas and said, "It's going to be okay Cas. You still have us. But what were you doing in that nest? You know it isn't ours." Cas looked up at Gabe and answered simply, "It was Luci's old nest. I missed him." Gabe sighed and pilled Cas closer. Of course his brother would hide in Lucifer's old nest. Gabe gently murmured, rubbing his hand through Cas' silky hair, "Oh Cas. I miss him too. But it's going to be okay, you still have Balthazar and I. We'll look after you."

Cas closed his eyes and snuggled into his brother, "Okay Gabby," he murmured. Gabe gently smiled and closed his eyes, his heart slowly breaking from the events of the day. He knew it would take time but eventually it would be alright.

God looked down at his angels, upset at what had happened to them. He had known this was coming. It was part of the Great Plan after all, but he had never known that it would cause his children this much heartbreak. His gaze then fell on three of his angels. He smiled as he saw them nestled up against each other. Maybe it would be okay. Maybe these angels would be left with love in their heart. He hoped, for Cas' sake that they were.


	3. In the Nest

Gabriel awoke to find black and silver wings gently tickling his face. Cas' wings were sitting on his forehead, just above his eyes and Balthazar's wings were laying across his chest, resting slightly on his chin moving with each breath Gabe took. He smiled as he saw Cas and Balthazar sleeping peacefully by his side, their faces calm and their bodies relaxed. Gabe felt a moment of peace before the events of the previous day came back to him in a crushing flood of memories. Gabe groaned and leaned back in his nest, waking Balthazar, but miraculously not Cas. That angel could sleep through just about anything.

"You okay Gabe?" Balthazar asked, concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine Balthazar," Gabe replied, but Balthazar didn't look convinced, "I just don't want to help out with cleaning up today, I promise. I mean, can you imagine what Zachariah is going to be like?"

Balthazar smiled at Gabe, trying to hide his laugh so he wouldn't wake Cas up.

Further conversation was stopped however, when the tan coloured mass between them opened his eyes and yawned, blinking his eyes tiredly. "Good morning Cas," Gabe said, "how are you feeling today?" Piercing blue eyes met warm honey brown and Gabe hoped that Cas would have somehow forgotten about the pain of yesterday and would be back to his usual happy and innocent self today.

Cas looked up at Gabe with a ghost of a smile on his face and Gabe felt a flicker of hope. That was extinguished however when Cas' face fell and tears threatened to spring from his wide eyes. Gabe looked alarmed and quickly hushed Cas, gathering him in his arms. "Hey Cas, it's okay, it's okay, I'm not going to leave you. I promise. Don't get upset. It's okay. We're here. We're not going to leave you."

Cas calmed, his breathing slowing and looked up into Gabe's face. "You promise Gabby?" Cas asked.

"Of course Cas. I'm never going to let you go," Gabe replied. Cas smiled and snuggled into Gabe, wrapping his small wings around his big brother.

Balthazar looked over, a sad smile on his face, and Gabe beckoned him over into the embrace. Balthazar quickly scurried into his brothers' arms and held him tight. Gabe pressed his face into this younger brothers' sandy blonde hair and whispered "And I'm never going to leave you either Balthazar." Balthazar nodded mutely, still tucked into his older brothers comforting arms, not being able to say anything without his voice breaking or crying.

They sat, entwined together, for a few minutes before Gabe slowly disentangled himself. Looking into his brothers' eyes he sighed and said, "I guess we better face the day. I'm sure your brothers and sisters need a hand in cleaning up. Zach won't be too happy if we don't show up and help." Balthazar stood up and stretched his wings out behind him, grinning again and Gabe did the same, shimmering silver feathers mixing with vibrant gold. Cas tried to do the same thing, his young wings only stretching a small way out from his body, not even reaching to brush with his older brother's wings.

Gabe looked down at Cas, smiling, and instinctively reached down to smooth his unruly black hair. Something else caught Gabe's eye when he reached down however. His hand had accidentally brushed Cas' wing and he had pulled it back. On closer inspection Gabe saw that a number of his feathers were bent out of place and one was missing.

Gabe looked down at Cas with worry in his eyes and asked "Cas, how did you hurt your wing?"

Cas avoided Gabe's eyes and answered "When I was running away yesterday, I hit my wing." Gabe looked at Cas suspiciously, sensing that it wasn't the truth but upon seeing Cas' wide blue eyes staring up at him Gabe relented and decided that he could find out the truth later.

Gabe hopped out of the nest, carrying Cas, and landed gently and elegantly on the ground. Balthazar followed suit, but didn't land quite as elegantly, instead falling over when he got to the ground, getting a mouthful of dirt. After all, he hadn't been flying for as long as Gabe and was still refining his skills. Cas however, found this quite funny and laughed at his older brother. Balthazar stood up quickly, spitting out the dirt and pushing his wings out. "Just wait till you're flying Cas and then we'll see how elegantly you land."

Gabe laughed ruffled Balthazar's hair, saying, "It's okay Balthazar you'll get better with practice. Now let's go and help everyone."

Gabe, Balthazar and Cas set off towards the place where they could hear their brothers and sisters working. They did not make a noise but they could all clearly understand just how bad the damage to their home was.

God saw his children working to clean up his – their – home and felt a pang of regret at leaving them at a time when they were so vulnerable. He wondered if he had done the right thing. Maybe he should have stayed and helped them to recover. After the war he had felt the change in some of his angels. They had become harder, battle-worn, cold-hearted soldiers. The fighting had turned them into soldiers who did nothing but follow orders. He just hoped that there would be some who still had enough love left in them to carry out the original mission, "Love the humans above all. Do everything to protect them." He hoped that some would keep the free will he had gifted to all of his creations and the heart to do what was right.

His gaze fell on his youngest archangel and two of his youngest angels. He smiled as he felt the love that was in their hearts. He knew that they could be relied on to protect his greatest creations. He knew that above all, they would be loyal to family. He knew that no matter what happened, they would never forget their family. They would never forget each other.

* * *

 **Author's note:** Thank you to everyone who reads this! Let me know what you think!


	4. When we were Young

Gabe saw the angels cleaning up Heaven and his walk slowed to a dawdle. He did not want to clean up Heaven because he knew that when they were done everything would be different. Nothing was the same ever since the fighting had started and nothing could be returned to what it was now that the fighting had finished. He just wanted everything to return to the days when he was still a fledgling and Michael and Lucifer adored him. Or the days when he first became a guardian and they would spend their time doting over Cas and Balthazar. Or the time when their father was still here and he would sit and talk with them, smiling. But he couldn't go back. Life couldn't ever go back to what it had been.

Gabe felt a pang of loss as he reflected on what his life used to be like. How happy and carefree he used to be. He could still remember the day when Michael and Lucifer taught him how to fly for the first time. They had taken Gabe to Earth, long before humans had been created, and were standing in an empty field. Raphael had come with them as well but he had already learnt to fly and was practicing elsewhere. He had been terrified but excited at the same time. Finally he was able to be like his brother. Finally he was growing up. Now, Gabe wished that he was still that young. That he was still learning to fly. That he hadn't grown up and that his family was still together and happy. But all he could do now was remember the happy times and to try and move on.

* * *

Slowly Gabe unfurled his wings and felt the wind rustle his feathers. He stretched them out further, enjoying the cool, almost ticklish feeling it provided. Michael and Lucifer watched in amusement for a while, enjoying the feeling on their wings as well. Eventually they began to instruct him. Michael gently told him what to do and Lucifer encouraged him as Gabe began to move his wings. Gradually he rose into the air and felt both a rush of terror and joy at being off the ground. His brothers cheered him and uncurled their wings, pure white brushing deep red. Almost effortlessly, they rose into the air and joined their younger brother. While Michael and Lucifer's wings flapped slowly and elegantly, Gabe's wings were flapping rapidly as he desperately tried to keep himself in the air. His older brother's laughed and taught him how to use the wind to stay up, laughing at Gabe's look of amazement when it worked.

As they flew Michael and Lucifer gave him pointers and helped him when he began to tire. Before long, they were back on the ground, Gabe's still small wings not yet being able to take too much use. Lucifer held Gabe in his arms as Michael called Raphael back to them and together they made the warp-speed flight back to Heaven, Gabe curled up securely in Lucifer's arms.

Upon returning, Gabe and Raphael felt a wave of exhaustion sweep over them and they yawned. Lucifer, seeing this, decided to take them back to their nest, telling Michael that he would be back soon. Holding Gabe in his arms, Lucifer and Raphael took off into the air, leaving a bemused Michael behind. When they arrived, Lucifer gently placed Gabe in the nest and moved to leave, but seeing them curled up, looking so small in the nest, he changed his mind and laid down next to them, drawing the two younger angels closer to him and closing his eyes.

As Michael was passing by the nest he saw his younger brothers curled up together, a mess of red, green and gold wings decorating the nest. A gentle smile made its way onto his peaceful face as he climbed in and placed his stately white wing over his brothers, as if shielding them from harm. Michael watched his brother's feeling a sense of peace and calm wash over him. It didn't matter what he had to do later, all that mattered was laying here with his brother's. Michael slowly fell asleep with his brothers curled against him. In a relatively empty and young Heaven, the four angels who lived there were all together, sleeping peacefully, each feeling safe in each other's wings.

* * *

Gabriel awoke from his daydream and found Cas and Balthazar looking up at him expectantly, wondering why he had stopped. Gabe forced himself to smile at them and beckoned them forwards towards the other angels. They scurried off and greeted their siblings before starting to help out. Gabriel raked his eyes over his siblings yet he didn't see Michael or Raphael. He had half been hoping that it would be the same as it was during his memory. All of his brother's working together happily in a perfect Heaven, feeling safe and calm together. But in reality, it had not been like that for a very long time in Heaven. And Gabe doubted that it would ever be like that again.

In all honesty, Gabe had not expected to see Michael and Raphael helping out with all of the other angels. His archangel brothers had begun to distance themselves from the other angels and the angels had done the same back. It hurt him to see the younger angels treating him as if he was someone to be feared and obeyed instead of the older brother who had raised them and loved them. They saw him as a soldier, a commander, instead of a friend and brother. Gabe felt a flash of anger as he realised that his life and the life of all the other angels could never go back to what it once was. The older, senior angels were expected to be commanders, capable of giving out orders without mercy. And the younger, more junior angels were expected to be mindless soldiers, following the orders given to them without a semblance of free thought.

Gabe's anger cooled as he saw Cas and Balthazar wave at him and he smiled as he realised that he still had two angels who loved him with all of their hearts. They at least still had free will and love and he was going to make sure that they kept that. He made a promise to himself that he would never willingly hurt or abandon them for as long as he lived. He didn't know just how soon he would break that promise.


	5. Paradise Found

Gabe stood up and brushed the dirt off his hands. He had spent the day repairing Heaven with his siblings. He sighed when he saw how much they still had left to do. The collapsed buildings, the destroyed nests, the torn up streets. His eyes wandered lazily over the angels in front of him until they fell on his two charges, sitting tiredly on a pile of rubble. Gabe saw the miserable, tired expressions on their faces and decided that they needed some cheering up. Gabe thought about what he could do and realised where they should go. He knew Cas and Balthazar had never been to the garden and Gabe knew that it was the one place in Heaven left undamaged. After all, their father would not be too happy if the place which started everything was destroyed.

Cas and Balthazar looked up as they saw their older brother coming over to them. Gabe knelt down and asked them, "Would you two like to go somewhere that you've never been before?".

Cas and Balthazar looked up, excitement igniting in their eyes. "Where are we going Gabby? Where haven't we been?" Cas asked excitedly.

Gabe answered, "It's a special place Cassie. Only a few angels have been there. It's called Eden."

Balthazar asked quickly, "Are we really going there Gabe? I didn't think that we were allowed to!"

In response Gabe raised his eyebrows and said, "Well... You're with me now and I say we can go. So... You guys ready?" Balthazar and Cas scrambled to their feet and followed their older brother quickly, all semblances of tiredness disappearing from them. Gabe laughed quietly to himself at how much energy Cas and Balthazar still seemed to have after a day of hard work.

* * *

The sounds slowly faded behind the three angels as they walked away. Cas and Balthazar were bubbling with excited chatter, but fell silent as Eden came into view. Even Gabe, who had often sought refuge there, was amazed by its beauty. The three angels reverently entered the garden and took in its breathtaking beauty. The sight of the vibrant, luscious and whole plants was a welcome relief to the angels who had only seen broken piles of white rubble for ages now.

Out of nowhere an older looking angel appeared. "Hello Gabriel," the angel said, "I see that you have bought some more angels here."

"Hello Joshua," Gabriel replied, "This is Cas and Balthazar, my two charges. I thought that they could use a break from what has happened out there, so I brought them to see this."

Joshua looked thoughtfully at the young angels and said, "I have heard a lot about you two. You must be very special to Gabriel for him to bring you in here. This is usually where he comes alone to relax and to get away from everyone." The two younger angels looked up curiously at Joshua, never having seen him before.

Turning to Gabe he said, "I shall let you go. If you need me, you know how to find me." With that Joshua disappeared leaving the angels alone again.

Gabe turned to face Cas and Balthazar and said, "Are you ready to keep going?" The two angels nodded and together they set off again.

Balthazar looked up at Gabe, "Gabe, who is Joshua?" he asked.

"The angel who just spoke to you, obviously," Gabe replied with a grin.

Balthazar groaned and rolled his eyes, "I know that, but what does he do? Why have we never seen him before?"

Gabe glanced down at Balthazar, "well," he started, "Joshua is special. He looks after the garden. But not only that, he also talks to Father. From what I hear, the two are quite close. But," he said hurriedly, trying to answer Balthazar's next question, "that's all I know about him and I don't know how true the whole talking to Dad thing is."

Balthazar closed his mouth and nodded, his interest already turning away from the conversation and towards the delights which surrounded them in the garden. Gabriel simply smiled, amused at how quickly their interest in topics jumped.

Before long the angels had reached the centre of Eden and their eyes fell upon a giant tree which rose up in front of them. The tree was a beautiful contrast with luscious green stemming off a deep chocolate brown. Gabriel's face relaxed into a soft smile as he sunk to the ground in his favourite spot. A soft, springy, mossy spot under the shade of the thick leaves. Cas and Balthazar, however decided to play around the base of the tree flying through the low-lying branches. Gabe watched for a while, making sure they weren't going to hurt themselves – especially Cas who couldn't fly well – before he shut his eyes and allowed himself to relax, the worries of the day fading into the back of his mind, the only sounds being the occasional giggles of his young angels and the soft sounds of leaves blowing in the breeze.

Cas and Balthazar, upon wearing themselves out, flew back to the ground and nestled into Gabe's side, spreading their wings over him. Gabe's eyes slowly opened and seeing the two exhausted angels he stood up and said, "Well, I guess I better get you two home to bed." Cas and Balthazar climbed tiredly onto Gabe's shoulders and held on tightly as he flew them back to the nest, both of them now being too tired to fly back on their own.

Not long later, Gabe landed and laid his two brother's down, smiling as they curled around each other, their wings looking like ying and yang, one black wing curled around one silvery wing. He suddenly felt a wave of exhaustion sweep over him and instead of going back out to his other siblings he laid down beside his brothers and closed his eyes, draping a golden wing over the two fledglings. Stretching out, to get comfortable, Gabe comforted himself by thinking that the other angels would do fine without him and with that worry gone he quickly fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

 **Author's note:** Hey everyone! Thanks for sticking with this story. I hope you're enjoying it and as always, let me know what you think!


	6. Reflecting

Michael paced around his office in Heaven. Their father had left, leaving him in charge, but he wasn't sure that he was up for the job right now. He had only been starting to understand the intricacies of Heaven when his father had left. His father had always said that they were driving him so mad that he might just leave but none of them had ever took him seriously. Michael had been interested in the running of Heaven but had always been relaxed about it, assuming that his father would always be there to run Heaven. He had never, not in his best dreams of worst nightmares, thought that he would have to run Heaven alone. Let alone, try to clean up Heaven after one of the worst, arguably the worst, fights there had ever been. How could he be expected to do this? How could his father expect him to command every angel in Heaven and to look after every aspect of his home. Michael felt a flash of anger as he thought about how his father had left him, left them all, alone without any notice at one of the worst times. Michael had no one to turn to now. Lucifer, the brother he could once trust was gone. Thrown into Hell by Michael's own hand. Gabriel was too busy looking after his two fledglings to be any help. And Raphael. Well, Raphael could possibly help, in time, but right now, the second youngest archangel had no idea of what was involved in running Heaven. Michael had never felt so alone or so helpless.

He had hated seeing the destruction of Heaven and the pain of his siblings. He had wanted to help them but he wasn't sure how. How could he help his siblings, when all of his help could have just put them in danger of being hurt. He was too consumed in the fight that never should have happened. He didn't want to drag any of his other brothers into the fight they never should have been a part of. But they had become a part of the fight and they'd been injured. He should have done more to prevent it. Should have ensured that the fight was just between him and Lucifer. He had tried to, but it hadn't been enough. When he had been fighting with Lucifer he had distanced himself from his younger siblings and they had done the same back. They now only saw him as the leader of Heaven. Not as one of their brothers. His brothers had been changed by the war. They had become harder, colder, unfeeling. They no longer had the happy and carefree mindsets they had had before the war. But Michael hoped that there were still some angels left which were still loving and not simply cold soldiers. He hoped that he hadn't failed Heaven, and his family completely.

Michael was sure that Gabriel had made sure that Balthazar and Cas had remained unchanged and for that he was forever grateful. He hadn't wanted the young angels to become involved because he knew it would change them forever. Michael knew he was changed. He could still feel the pain of losing Lucifer. Whatever had happened, he still loved his little brother. He had hated throwing him in Hell even though it had been on their fathers' orders. Michael hoped that one day he would be able to see his brother again, but for now, he had to look after Heaven and his remaining siblings.

* * *

Balthazar had retreated to Earth on his own. He was still young and shouldn't have been down here without Gabriel and the flight down to Earth was difficult but once he was down there it was relaxing and worth the difficulty of getting there. It was true that Earth was not quite like some of the places his siblings sought solitude in, rather it was the opposite. There was noise everywhere. Where Heaven was quiet and peaceful, Earth was noisy and chaotic and Balthazar loved it. He had discovered the portal to Earth at some point during the fighting when he was running away from the main fighting and he now tried to come down whenever he didn't think he would be missed. Whenever he needed to distract himself. Technically, he wasn't supposed to come to Earth, but he was sure that nobody would mind. Well, Gabriel might a little when he realised that he was gone but Balthazar tried not to be gone for too long. And he felt slightly guilty about leaving Cas alone when Gabriel was still so distracted, but sometimes he just needed to escape from Heaven.

On Earth, Balthazar wandered aimlessly thinking about everything that had occurred. Balthazar had been quite close to Lucifer, unlike many of the other angels. Since he had been Gabriel's charge when he was young, he had grown up with Lucifer around him. Sure, Lucifer could be mischievous and argumentative but he was also fiercely loyal and loving towards his family and Balthazar could not begrudge him for that. After all, Balthazar loved Cas and Gabe and the rest of his family more than anything else and would never do anything to intentionally hurt them. In fact, he would do anything to protect them from hurting themselves.

Balthazar knew that everything had changed now that Lucifer had been exiled. His siblings bickered between themselves and there was obvious tension, as if everyone was waiting for what would happen next. Balthazar had never heard the full story of what Lucifer had done to be exiled. He mused about what could have been so bad that God himself ordered Lucifer to be thrown in Hell. Balthazar felt a stab of pain at the thought that he would never see his brother again. He would miss him and Heaven would not be the same. Balthazar knew that everything had changed, even Gabe, and he realised that he had too. Balthazar vowed to never leave Gabe and Cas for as long as they needed and loved him. He couldn't put them through the pain of losing another brother.

* * *

Gabe was, once again, sitting in Eden. He often went there when he wanted peace and needed time to think. It was peaceful and quiet and empty with no one but the archangels and Joshua being allowed to go there. Although, Gabe thought, it would become a lot less quiet now that he had given Cas and Balthazar permission to go there. Those two made up half the noise in Heaven, he thought to himself with a smile on his face.

Gabe had spent the last few days looking after his younger siblings and helping in cleaning Heaven. Things were starting to get back to normal now, at least in terms of the buildings and landscape, but other things were changed and Gabe knew that they would never go back to how they were before. Already some of his brothers and sisters had been thrown out of Heaven for supporting Lucifer. He couldn't believe that they were now throwing their own siblings out of their home for believing in something else. Sure, Lucifer had disobeyed their father and ignored their mission, but surely something else could have been done rather than banishing him and his supporting angels from Heaven forever. Gabe just couldn't quite believe that their father could be so cruel to the son who was once his favourite.

Gabe would miss all of them, of course, but the greatest sadness he felt was for Lucifer. A ghost of a smile came to Gabe's face as he remembered the tricks that he and Lucifer had gotten up to when they were younger. He remembered Michael, pretending be angry, but actually laughing with them. He remembered Raphael, trying to work out why Gabe and Lucifer were laughing at him and laughing with them when he realised. He remembered his older brothers helping him when he didn't know what to do with Cas and Balthazar when he first became their carer.

Gabe leaned his head back onto the tree, shutting his eyes and turning his face upwards. A single tear traced its solitary path down his face as he thought of his brother, alone in his own, private prison, forever excluded from Heaven and from his family.

* * *

Lucifer sat huddled in his cage. His once pure red wings were now singed with hellfire black as he held them tightly against his body. He was surrounded by heat yet he still shivered when he thought of his old home and the damage he had caused. Despite always presenting a tough exterior to everyone around him, Lucifer couldn't stop the tears from rolling down his face when he thought about what he had left behind. Why did he have to rebel against his father? Why couldn't he just hold his tongue and be the good archangel he was expected to be? But why wouldn't his father listen to him? Why was he punished for loving his own family more than anything else? More than his father's newest creations. Humanity, was supposedly his father's best creation but it was so flawed and damaged that Lucifer couldn't bring himself to love them. Why did his father have to ruin the perfect family they had? And why did Lucifer now have to pay the price for it?

Lucifer felt a pang of loss as he thought of his brothers, Michael, Raphael, Gabriel, Balthazar and his smallest brother. Lucifer thought of Cas and Gabe with sorrow. They had both been so similar to him. He had felt that same flame of defiance, of free will. Lucifer leaned back onto the bars of his cage his heart filled with pain. Lucifer felt something in his hand. He opened it to find a slightly crushed black feather, his last reminder of his youngest brother, his family and of his home. Somewhere he would never be allowed to return to.

* * *

It had not been difficult for Cas to understand what had happened, however it was difficult for him to process. Cas knew that Lucifer was gone and would never return to Heaven, but he couldn't accept that it was true. He had loved Lucifer so much. Whatever people may think, Lucifer did have a soft side, and Cas had seen it. He remembered his brother as daring, cheeky and stubborn but he could also be caring and loyal. Almost painfully loyal, especially to those that he was close with. Lucifer would never hurt his family if he could help it, Cas thought. But the war had hurt so many of his siblings. It had changed so many of his siblings.

With Lucifer gone things were meant to return to "normal", however, there was now more bickering between the angels. Cas could sense the tension between them. It hurt him to see his family, once so loving and loyal, turning on each other. To make it worse, Cas had no idea how he could try to fix it. He had tried cheering his siblings up, but they didn't notice him anymore and he was too young to have any control. Balthazar was also still too young to try and change anything, although he did try and support Cas whenever he could.

Cas' thoughts turned to Gabe and Michael. They were old enough to change things and everyone would listen to them. However, he soon realised that this wouldn't work. Michael had not come out of his office since the war and he seemed to be too busy trying to run Heaven from afar. Gabriel was still out among the other angels, but he seemed different. He was more withdrawn, quieter and often retreated away from their siblings when he heard them fighting. He realised that there was only person who could help him. His Father had left Heaven but Cas was certain that he was still watching over them. Uncertainly, for the first time, Cas shut his eyes and prayed to a silent father.

 _Dear dad,_ he began, _I need your help._

* * *

God watched over his children with pain in his heart. He had never realised just how much hurt this would cause them. Despite what they might think, he was still watching them, making sure that they were okay. He would never abandon them completely. He couldn't. They were his family, his children after all and he would always love them. He saw his eldest son trying his best to get Heaven back to normal. He was proud of him for taking on such a big role while he was still hurting. He saw Gabe, trying to protect the younger angels, while he felt lost with no one to look after him. He saw Lucifer, in his cage, begging for forgiveness, saying he never meant to hurt anyone. Lastly, God saw little Cas. He saw him trying to cheer the other angels up, while he hid his own sadness and confusion. He saw him trying to look after his older brothers, who were lost and alone. He saw that Cas had grown up. He was no longer the innocent fledgling, that had never felt loss or pain. He was now growing up and becoming the angel who would save not only the righteous man, but also the world. He knew that his innocence would be tainted, but it would never leave him completely. He knew that Castiel would always do what he believed was right.

God had never wanted to hurt his children, but maybe it wasn't all bad. Maybe, just maybe, some good would come of the situation.


	7. Babysitting Angels

Gabe was desperate. It was one of those times, when as the messenger of God, he was busy. He had been trying to avoid taking messages to Earth, so that he could look after his baby brothers, but he couldn't get out of it this time. He had tried asking everyone, even Zachariah, but they were all too busy to look after Cas and Balthazar. He hadn't wanted to ask Michael and Raphael but they were his only options.

Hesitantly, Gabe walked up to Michael's office. He knocked and heard a voice say wearily, "Come in." Gabe entered and saw Michael sitting at his desk, but it wasn't the Michael that Gabe remembered. The once fierce warrior was now sitting dejectedly behind his desk, slumped forward tiredly. Gabe was instantly worried.

Hesitating a moment, he asked, "Are you alright, Mickey? You seem... Tired." Gabe already knew that this was a stupid thing to say. Full-grown angels didn't get tired, but it was the only way to describe him.

Michael waved his hand and smiled at Gabe, "I'm fine Gabe. Just getting used to things. What's wrong?" Gabe's forehead cleared but inside a small shred of worry still nagged at him. Gabe decided not to worry about it now, he would ask him again later. Right now he needed someone to look after his charges.

"Are you too busy to look after Cas and Balthazar for me?" Gabe said, "It's just that I have to deliver messages and I can't take them and everyone else is busy and..."

Michael held up his hand, stopping Gabe's rush of words. "Gabe, it's okay. I'd be happy to look after them for you. Father knows that I don't see enough of them."

Gabe's face split into a thankful smile. "Thanks so much Michael. You're a lifesaver."

With that he turned and rushed out the door, letting it slam closed behind him. Michael chuckled at his younger brother. Trust Gabe to come to him to ask for help with babysitting some baby fledglings. Michael didn't mind. He could do with a bit of fun. And maybe he could drag Raphael along as well.

* * *

Michael and Raphael walked towards the nest that Gabe shared with Cas and Balthazar. As they got closer they heard the chattering of the two young angels, a sound which was familiar all through Heaven. A gentle smile passed across Michael's face as he saw them sitting together in the nest. Raphael stood slightly behind him looking bored, wondering why he had to come and look after the two of them when he could have been doing so many other things. The young angels looked up in curiosity as Michael and Raphael approached, their talking stopping almost immediately.

Balthazar discreetly placed himself in front of Cas and puffed out his wings a little. Michael found it amusing that Balthazar, still so small, was trying to protect his younger brother. Michael smiled and gently said, "It's okay Balthazar, Gabe sent me to look after you two while he is away." Balthazar relaxed a bit but still stood protectively in front of Cas, his silver wings shielding most of the younger angel from view. Michael hesitated for a second. What were they going to do with two young, very active, angels? Suddenly he remembered something Gabe had told him a while ago which could work to keep the two of them amused for the day.

* * *

Michael walked with Cas and Balthazar into a large, open air arena with Raphael following behind him. The two younger angels looked around in awe. Michael smiled to himself. He had guessed correctly, the angels had never been into the flying arena. Gabe had said that Cas wasn't a strong flier yet, which surprised Michael slightly. Cas had powerful looking wings which were bigger than a normal fledgling's wings. They were longer and sleeker looking than the average angels wings, with the black feathers glinting in the sunlight like the edge of a knife. But then again, with everything that had been happening, he probably hadn't had much practice with flying, or any of the training which fledglings usually received. Michael cursed himself for not checking on his baby brothers more often. Maybe he would be able to make up for it a little today. After all, the memories of him and his brothers learning to fly were some of the best memories Michael had.

It had taken a while but Cas was now flying around the arena, looking both terrified and amazed. Balthazar had been eager start flying and he had quickly launched himself into the air, with only the slightest wobbling. Cas had been afraid to start but after some gentle encouragement from his oldest brother he had tentatively lifted off the ground, letting out a gasp of excitement when he had started flying.

Michael launched into the air, his wings still hidden from sight. As an experienced flyer, he no longer needed to use his wings, finding them to be more of a hindrance than a help. The only time he revealed his wings any more was for show or to protect another angel. He swiftly arrived at where his baby brother was hovering. Cas, unlike his older brothers, was flapping his wings furiously to stay in the air.

Michael smiled, "relax," he said gently, "use the wind to help you stay in the air." Cas looked terrified at the thought of not using his wings so Michael revealed his long, pure white, wings and showed Cas how to do it. Michael moved his wings so that they caught the gentle breeze and flapped them only occasionally to stay at the same height.

Slowly Cas followed his lead, gasping in amazement when it worked. Michael smiled and quickly glanced over to Balthazar to make sure that he was okay. What he saw brought a smile to his face. Raphael, usually stern and unsmiling, was showing Balthazar how to do tricks in the air, and laughing when Balthazar did something funny. Michael realised that he was feeling more relaxed now, than he could remember feeling for a long time.

They continued to fly for a while longer, and Cas gradually became more and more confident, but Michael soon noticed that Cas was starting to tire. This was his first real flying lesson after all and he had done surprisingly well although he would need a lot more practice before he could fly as well as the other angels. Michael looked over to Raphael and signalled for him to come down before turning to Cas and saying, "Okay Cassie, that's enough for today." Cas nodded tiredly before flying into his brothers' arms and folding his wings in. Michael wrapped his arms around Cas, placing a hand between his two wings to support him, before letting Cas snuggle into his chest. He looked down at his younger brother curled in his arms and smiled gently, feeling a wave of affection wash over him.

Michael landed softly on the ground cradling his brother who was now curled, nearly asleep, into his chest. Together Michael, carrying Cas, Raphael and Balthazar set off towards the younger angels' nest. When they reached it Michael placed Cas down and Balthazar climbed in, curling up beside him, the older angel spreading his wing over Cas. Cas curled up underneath Balthazar's wing and snuggled closer to his older brothers side, falling back to sleep almost instantly.

Michael hesitated a second before climbing into the nest with his younger brothers. Raphael glanced at him quizzically for a second before quickly following suit and laying down next to Balthazar. Michael spread his wing over his brothers, covering them in a sheet of white, before smiling peacefully at his brothers and closing his eyes, feeling himself fall to sleep, finally at peace and happy.

When Gabe returned from delivering his messages he returned to the nest he shared with Cas and Balthazar. He was expecting it still to be empty because he was sure that Michael and Raphael wouldn't have been able to wear out Cas and Balthazar yet. Maybe, he thought happily, he would be able to get a bit of peace and quiet before Cas and Balthazar arrived back. To his surprise he saw not only his young charges but also his two older brothers sleeping peacefully together. Their wings combined to create a beautiful mess of white, green, silver and black. Gabe gently climbed into the nest and laid his gold wings over Michael, covering his oldest brother, who, for once, looked at peace. Gabe slowly shut his eyes, a smile resting on his face and fell asleep, feeling safe and happy surrounded by his brothers.


	8. What a Wonderful World

Heaven was quiet, as usual, and Cas and Balthazar were sitting together in Eden. The two had been running around, making a raucous as usual, for some time now but had become tired of their game a while ago and were now sitting under one of the many trees, catching their breath. Eden had quickly become their favourite place to go and they often spent time there with Gabe. Today, however, Gabe had something to do so they were alone. Gabe had been nervous about leaving them alone but Balthazar had managed to convince him that they would be fine together. After all, he couldn't bother Michael and Raphael again could he? Despite Balthazar's promise that he would keep Cas amused and out of trouble for the day, they were getting bored of just sitting around, doing nothing, and they were trying to think of what they could do to entertain themselves without annoying the older angels. Suddenly, Balthazar bolted upright, a mischievous smile spreading across his face. "What is it Balthy?" Cas asked, curious as to why his brother looked so excited. Cas didn't bother sitting up, the heat making him feel tired.

Balthazar turned to Cas and said, "I've just thought of something to do."

Cas looked at Balthazar, titling his head slightly and sitting a bit more upright, excited at the possibility of adventure and fun, "What is it?" he asked.

"How about we fly down to Earth spy on the humans," Balthazar said with a wide smile. Seeing Cas' hesitation Balthazar quickly said, "It'll be good practice for your flying and you'll get to see my favourite place." Balthazar watched Cas' face closely, hoping that he would say yes. Balthazar hadn't been to Earth for so long and he was longing to go back there again. Besides, Gabe had never said they had to stay in Heaven.

Cas considered what Balthazar had said for a second before nodding. Balthazar quickly jumped to his feet unfurling his wings and lifting into the sky. Cas followed him, a bit shaky at first but he quickly straightened, and Balthazar marvelled at how quickly his little brother had learnt to fly. He was sure that when he had first started he had taken much longer. Cas was going to be a natural when he started training, he thought to himself.

Before long they arrived at an area that they could fly to Earth from. There was only one of these Heaven to earth portals opened, to Balthazar's knowledge anyway, because apparently Michael didn't want angels going down to Earth. Especially when human-angel relationships were already so flaky. Balthazar felt a stab of worry about whether Cas could endure the warp speed flight to Earth, recalling how badly he had managed when he had first done it. And he had been a lot more experienced than Cas was. As if sensing his worry Cas looked at Balthazar and said, "I'll be okay Balthy. I'll just hold onto you."

Balthazar nodded not being able to resist against both his yearning to visit Earth again and Cas' puppy eyes. Cas grabbed onto Balthazar's arm as they both lifted into the air. Balthazar pumped his wings powerfully and angled himself towards the direction of Earth before he tucked his wings behind him and shot down towards Earth, first making sure that Cas was holding tight onto his arm.

Wind raced through Balthazar's hair and pounded through his ears. He felt Cas' grip tighten on his arm. Around him bright colours flashed. Brilliant blues and greens. Vibrant pinks and oranges. Deep reds and purples. All the colours that you could imagine and more were surrounding them, creating a beautiful rainbow which stamped itself into Balthazar's mind.

Suddenly his vision was filled with a blinding white, the sign that they were about to exit the portal and reach Earth. He quickly snapped his wings open and yelled, "Spread your wings Cassie!", hoping his younger brother could hear him over the roar of the wind in their ears. Suddenly, they were out of the roaring wind and in the middle of a clear blue sky. Balthazar fumbled a bit as he tried to regain his balance and quickly grabbed Cas. To his surprise Cas already had his wings flared out around him, flapping them desperately in an attempt to keep airborne. Balthazar was impressed. Cas had managed to make the flight from Heaven to Earth and had still been able to fly when he arrived on Earth.

Slowly Cas released his hold on Balthazar's arm. His eyes widened in awe at the landscape spread out in front of them. Unlike Heaven it was messy and chaotic but beautiful and peaceful. In front of them they could see wide fields of bright green, dark green forests, winding blue rivers and crudely built, red-brown houses. Balthazar let out a shaky sigh of relief that both of them had made it safely and allowed himself a smile as he reabsorbed the beauty of Earth. Looking at Cas, Balthazar saw that he looked slightly shaken and pale but excited nonetheless. Nudging his brother gently, Balthazar said, "C'mon Cassie. Let's go find some humans to spy on." Cas nodded and followed his brother towards the ground, eager to get out of the air and give his wings a break.

They swiftly landed in an open field surrounded by trees, Cas stumbling and nearly falling over as he landed. Balthazar landed only slightly more elegantly in his haste to keep up with his younger brother. As soon as they had tucked their wings behind them, Balthazar hid them from view with his grace. He didn't think humans would take kindly to two young boys walking around on their own with wings sprouting out of their back. Together, they set off towards a patch of evergreen trees with Cas running ahead and Balthazar walking contentedly behind him, taking in the beauty of Earth on all of its glory. Cas was amazed with all of the new objects around him and was constantly asking Balthazar what they were. In fact, Cas' constant curiosity about everything around him almost made Balthazar regret bringing his younger brother to his place of sanctuary and peacefulness.

Balthazar looked towards where Cas was and saw that he was following something, instead of stopping every couple of metres to look at something new. Balthazar hurried up to him, curious as to what had captured his little brothers' attention. As he got close he saw that Cas was staring with wonder at a small yellow and black insect which was resting on a pink flower.

Cas looked up at Balthazar and asked, "What's this Balthy?"

Balthazar smiled and replied, "It's a bee Cas, remember?" he paused as if thinking before saying, "Did you know that bees aren't meant to fly?"

Cas looked up at him, his eyes wide, and shook his head. Balthazar grinned and said, "Well, you've learnt something new today." Balthazar suddenly realised something, "would you like to keep looking at animals instead of trying to find people Cas?" he asked, hoping his suspicions were correct. Cas nodded vigorously a grin on his face. Balthazar smiled fondly at his younger brother as he ran off to explore.

Not too long after, Balthazar saw that Cas was beginning to tire. Not wanting him to be too exhausted to make the flight back Balthazar suggested that they head home. Cas nodded and grabbed onto Balthazar's arm as they lifted into the air before beginning the flight home. Balthazar was slightly disappointed that he wasn't able to show Cas some of his favourite spots but there was always next time.

* * *

Gabe had returned from his work and was trying to find his younger brothers. He remembered Balthazar saying that they might go to Eden and stay there for the day. He headed over there and tried to find them but they were nowhere to be seen. Gabe told himself not to worry, they had probably just become bored and wandered off, but he couldn't get rid of the feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach.

He then headed to their nest but again it was empty with no sign that the angels had been in it. Gabe was starting to panic now but he still tried to reason with himself that they must be somewhere in Heaven. He checked all of their favourite places and when they weren't there he checked the rest of his home.

By this point Gabe was in a state of utter panic. He didn't know what to do and he hadn't found his charges anywhere. He rushed towards Michael and Raphael's office, barging in on them. They both looked up in surprise. "What's wrong Gabe?" Michael asked, worried at seeing his brother so panicked, "Why are you so worried?"

Gabe frantically said, "I can't find Cas and Balthazar. They've disappeared! I've looked everywhere. Can you please help me find them?"

Michael and Raphael instantly stood up and rushed towards the door. Missing fledglings was an urgent matter especially when both of the fledglings were still quite young. Together they rushed out and proceeded to search Heaven for the angels. Not finding them, they met together and exchanged worried looks which conveyed their thoughts. None of them realised that they were standing under the portal to Earth until a brilliant white light and roaring wind came over them, causing them to scatter.

Cas and Balthazar exited the passageway between Heaven and Earth but as they did, Cas lost his grip on Balthazar's arm. Balthazar yelled out in shock as he saw his younger brother lose control and start falling, his wings flared out uselessly behind him. Underneath them, the three archangels watched as the horrifying scene unfolded, unable to do anything to help their youngest brother.

Cas tumbled towards the ground, falling without control. Balthazar quickly flew after him in panic, trying to catch his youngest brother, before he hit the ground, but he knew that it would be too late. Cas slammed into the ground, crumpling into a heap but not before Balthazar heard a sickening snap of bones followed by a heart-shattering scream which pierced the silence of Heaven.


	9. Broken Angel

For a fraction of a second Heaven was silent, Cas' scream still ringing in everyone's ears. The three archangels stood perfectly still, shocked at what they had seen. Balthazar hovered in the air over the crumpled form of his brother. Everyone jolted into action, however, when Cas' heart-wrenching sobs were heard.

Balthazar landed and ran towards his brother crying and apologising. Cas didn't seem to hear him however and curled up with tears streaming down his face. Michael, Gabriel and Raphael swiftly moved towards Cas with looks of worry on their faces. Michael gently picked Cas up and tried to work out where he had injured himself.

Raphael, who was holding back a frantic looking Gabe, said "Stay back Gabriel. Michael will find out where Castiel has injured himself. You are too panicked to try and help. You may do more harm than good." Gabe looked at Cas, wishing that he could comfort his baby brother, but he could not help seeing the wisdom in Raphael's words. He probably would hurt Cas if he tried to help him, he realised.

Michael was slightly confused when checking over Cas. Apart from some bruises and cuts from hitting the ground at such a fast speed, Cas did not appear to have any serious injuries. However, that soon changed as Michael turned Cas over and moved to touch his wings.

The state of Cas' wings made Michael feel sick. His wings were bent in unnatural directions and feathers were sticking out everywhere. Michael could only imagine how much pain the young fledgling must be in. As soon as his fingers touched Cas' wings, Cas screamed again, the sound ripping through Michael's heart.

Cas flailed in Michael's arms, trying to escape his older brothers grip. Michael hastily moved his hands away from Cas' wings, not wanting to hurt his brother any further. Tears were streaming down Cas' face, leaving him with red eyes and dirty tear tracks.

Michael hushed his baby brother, trying desperately comfort him, hating seeing one of his siblings in pain. "Shhh, Cas. It's OK, don't cry, please don't cry. It's going to be OK. Ralph's going to fix you." Cas looked at Michael with big blue eyed filled with tears, "It's hurts M..Mickey. Please make it stop." Michael answered him, "It's OK Cassie, it'll stop hurting soon. Shhh."

Balthazar tried to grab Cas from Michael's arms, yelling that he was hurting him. Michael quickly handed Cas to Raphael who was the best healer out of the three of them. After making sure that Cas was safe in Raphael's arms, Michael turned his attention to Balthazar. The young angel, although his intentions were good, was doing more harm than good.

Michael picked up Balthazar, making sure that he couldn't escape. Balthazar began thrashing in his arms and screaming, "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to hurt Cas. Please don't punish me! Please Michael! Gabe! Don't let them punish me!"

Balthazar broke down in tears and kept trying to escape Michael's firm hold. Although Balthazar was still only a young angel, his true voice was powerful and his screams pierced everyone's ears. Gabe looked at Balthazar in distress and moved to take him from Michael but realised that Balthazar needed to be away from Cas.

Michael, looking upset, stared down at Balthazar He might be a tough soldier of Heaven but when his younger siblings were upset it broke his heart and he became a mess inside. He held Balthazar tight against his chest, thinking that it may give the younger angel some comfort. Not being able to quite Balthazar, he hastily walked away towards his nest and Balthazar's screams gradually faded.

Raphael, still holding a sobbing Cas, looked up at Gabe and said solemnly, "He's broken his wings quite badly. I can heal them but he will need to rest and not use them." Gabe nodded and said, almost pleadingly, "Just do it. Do whatever you can to help him. Don't let him suffer anymore." Gabe hated the thought that little Cas was in pain and was desperate to stop his suffering.

Raphael nodded and gently placed his hands on Cas' small black wings, ignoring the screams which wrenched their way out of Cas' mouth, his true voice beginning to ring out. Gabe, hearing his baby brother in pain, instinctively wanted to grab Cas from Raphael and protect him. Gabe held himself back, wincing and clenching his fists every time that Cas cried out, trying to comfort himself with the knowledge that Raphael was helping Cas.

A wispy blue substance poured out of Raphael's hands and coiled itself around Cas' wings. Gabe saw the bones in his baby brothers' wings moving back into place as Raphael's grace worked. The bones moved like pieces in a jigsaw moving around until they slotted together in their correct places. The bruises which had started to cover Cas' small bodies began to fade and the scratches decorating his body started to heal and fade away under Raphael's expert touch.

Eventually, Cas' wings were mended and Raphael's grace disappeared. Raphael handed Cas over to Gabe and said, "Make sure he rests and doesn't use his wings until they get a bit stronger." Gabe nodded and gently held Cas in his arms, trying to avoid touching his wings. Cas' face was red and covered in tears and Gabe realised just how young his brother was and how easily he could be hurt.

Raphael looked down at Cas and said, "I've eased the pain for a while but he will probably be sore when he wakes up tomorrow." Gabe nodded and said gratefully, "Thank you so much Raphael. I don't think I could have done that on my own. Could you thank Michael for me as well?" Raphael nodded, "It was no problem Gabriel. I will always help my brother's when they are hurt."

Reaching down to touch Cas' hair Raphael softly said, "I suggest that you go and take the little one to his nest." Gabe nodded and opened his mouth to thank Raphael again before thinking better off it. He turned and hurried off, holding Cas tightly against his chest.

Cas' sobs slowly eased and turned into soft sniffling into Gabe's chest. Gabe looked down at his younger brother and brushed some of Cas' hair from his wet face. Cas looked up at Gabe wearily, big blue eyes blinking slowly, tears still clinging to his long black lashes. Gabe hushed Cas, running a have through his hair, "Shhh. It's OK Cassie. Go to sleep. It's OK. I've got you." Cas slowly closed his eyes and Gabe felt his body relax as he fell into a deep sleep.

By the time they reached the nest, Cas was fast asleep and tucked into Gabe's arms. Gabe gingerly placed his youngest charge down in the nest, noting that Balthazar was not there. He assumed that Michael was looking after him for the night. He felt a pang of regret at not comforting Balthazar when he was worried earlier but he had been so worried about Cas. He promised that he would make up to Balthazar when saw him.

Gabe gingerly laid down next to his brother and gently spread his wings over Cas, trying to avoid touching Cas' newly healed wings. Cas' face was now peaceful and calm, Gabe noted, so different to how it was before. Together they laid in the nest with Gabe watching over Cas for the entire night, never once closing his eyes, making sure his baby brother was OK.

 **Note:** Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you have a good break. Thanks for reading and let me know what you think!


	10. The Dark Side of Heaven

In a nest in Heaven, a small angel with dark wings lay tucked against the side of an older angel with brilliant gold wings, a bubble of silence surrounding them.

* * *

Gabe lay staring at his Cas' young face; the long, dark eyelashes covering vibrant blue eyes, the messy black hair which flopped over his forehead, the peaceful expression resting on his face. His gaze moved to Cas' wings, remembering the horror of the previous day.

The wings, which were now perfect and smooth had, not so long ago, been broken and destroyed. Although Cas' wings looked healed now, he was anxious as to whether they would be sore when the young fledgling awoke.

Gabe let his eyes roam, taking in the features of his nest. It was different from most other nests in Heaven. All nests were made of a dark brown material that looked like twigs but was actually soft and comfortable for the angels to rest in.

Where Gabe's nest differed, however, was in relation to what was inside the nests. While most nests were empty, save for anything which might be required to look after fledglings or related to an angels job, Gabe's nest was filled with artifacts that he and his brothers had found whilst exploring both Heaven and Earth.

Around the nest were a number of multicoloured sea shells which they had found, bright flowers, leaves and vines made up of varying shades of green and numerous white fossils. Gabe had disliked the conformity of all the other angels and had always sought to make whatever he owned different and interesting. He sensed the same feeling in both Balthazar and Cas and he quietly hoped that they wluld not bend to the pressure to conform in Heavens strict hierarchy.

Gabe's thoughts were interrupted when he heard a soft shuffling beside him. He looked down to find Cas staring up at him. "Hey Cassie," Gabe murmured, running his fingers through Cas' soft hair, "How are you feeling?" Cas looked up at him, blinking wearily, "My wings are sore Gabby," he answered quitely, still sounding half asleep. "Are they as bad as yesterday?" Gabe asked hoping that his baby brother would answer no.

Cas shook his head and said, "No but they don't feel right." Gabe smiled in relief, "it's OK Cas. Remember Raphael said yesterday that they would hurt for a bit?" Cas tilted his head, as if trying to remember, before shrugging and moving towards Gabe.

All of a sudden, Cas seemed to wake up properly and he realised someone was missing. "Where's Balthazar," he asked, with a note of panic in his voice, sitting up quickly. Cas winced as his wings moved and Gabe, seeing this, reached out for Cas and said, "it's OK, Mike took him last night because he was afraid that he was going to hurt you."

Cas' brow creased in confusion, "Why was Balthy so scared then Gabby? What was he talking about when he said he didn't want to be punished? Who are Abner and Gadreel?" Gabe had desperately hoped that Cas wouldn't remember what Balthazar had said about being punished. His heart sank as he realised that he would have to answer Cas. He hadn't wanted his baby brother to know about Heavens dark side just yet.

Cas continued to look at Gabe, his blue eyes demanding an answer. Gabe tried desperately to think of another answer to Cas' question but upon seeing his young brothers serious face he decided that Cas deserved the truth.

Gabe looked at Cas and said, hesitantly, "How about we sit down Cassie? It's a bit of a long story." Cas nodded and sat down in front of Gabe, ready to listen, although Gabe wasn't sure that he was ready to tell. "Well," Gabe started, "Deep in the depths of Heaven, there is an area where angels who have done wrong go to be punished.". Gabe's thoughts flashed back to a time many years ago as he told Cas the story of Heavens dungeons.

* * *

Gabe hurried down a dark passageway under the main part of Heaven. The walls were made of rough, dark stone and water fell in loud drops which echoed despondently. Lights flickered above him, casting eerie yellow shadows over the floor. A damp cold feeling leeched from the walls and settled in the recess of his bones. Gabe pulled his robe tighter around him, the white seeming to glow in the darkness as he hurried his steps.

Gabe's footsteps echoed off the hard walls and his footsteps slowed as he neared his destination. Suddenly, a cell with two angels inside appeared. The white of their robes had long since faded, consumed by dirt and blood. The powerful aura, which surrounded all angels, had faded away to almost nothing as their grace had faded, leaving two broken angels. Gabe instantly sensed their pain but he also sensed their love for each other, the only thing keeping them alive.

The two angels, lying broken and beaten at the back of the cell, looked up upon sensing Gabriel's prescence. However, another angel also turned around and looked at him. This angel was powerful and muscular with a clean white robe and a whip through his belt. His aura was strong and hard and Gabriel felt the hatred radiating of him. "Gabriel. What are you doing here?" The powerful angel asked, wary that Gabriel was an archangel, who was significantly more powerful then him. "Hello Thaddeus," Gabriel replied smoothly, "I was simply coming to talk to these two angels. If that's not a problem with you of course"

Gabriel felt distinctly uncomfortable but he was determined not to show it. After all, he was an archangel and he was not going to give a lower angel the pleasure of seeing him in a weak state. Looking at the two beaten angels, Gabriel said, with brotherly love in his voice, "Hello Abner. Hello Gadreel."

Thaddeus glared at Gabriel knowing that he had no power to stop the archangel from visiting those in Heaven's dungeons. Thaddeus said, struggling to keep his anger in check, "I will be in my office if you need me Gabriel." Without another word Thaddeus strode off, his whip hitting against his side.

Gabriel waited until Thaddeus was well out of earshot before walking over to Abner and Gadreel and kneeling beside them. His eyes swiftly took in the injuries on their bodies; cuts from angel blades, skin sliced from a whip, burns scattered over their bodies, bruises, ranging from a sickly yellow to a dark blue. Their wings were laying behind them, no longer vibrant and gleaming but dirty and injured, with feathers torn out and bruises, cuts and burns decorating them.

The two angels shrank away from Gabriel when he tried to move closer. Gabriel was devastated to see them scared of their own brother. He silently cursed Thaddeus for turning Abner and Gadreel into frightened shadows of who they used to be. Gabriel reached his hand out again letting it gently rest on Abner's wings. "What have they done to you," Gabriel whispered gently, appalled at the condition of his brothers. Abner flinched at Gabriel's touch but made no attempt to move away, instead looking at him with wide, frightened eyes. "It's OK," Gabriel murmured, his hands gently brushing through Abner and Gadreel's wings, "It's going to be OK. I'll fix you."

A light blue substance slipped from Gabriel's fingertips and wound it's way around Abner and Gadreel's bodies. As Gabriel's grace touched their bodies, the numerous injuries began to heal and their robes returned to their usual white colour. Gabriel always loved watching an angel being healed. It seemed so simple and elegant, the way that the injuries just vanished as the grace washed over them. This time however, he just felt sick that he was having to heal his brothers for torture that they had endured in the apparently perfect and forgiving Heaven.

Abner and Gadreel looked at wonder at their newly healed bodies. Gadreel looked up at Gabriel and raspily said, in a low voice, "Thank you Gabriel. It...It's been so long since I...Since either of us have been without pain. We will remember this kindness." Gabriel waved his hand, dismissing Gadreel's compliment, partly embarrassed but mostly angry that they felt stunned when anyone showed them a shred of kindness. "It's nothing," Gabriel replied, "Any half decent angel would have done the same thing. You shouldn't have to endure this. I will talk to Thaddeus and try to get you both released."

Gadreel hung his head, "There's no point in trying to get me released. I'll never be forgiven for what I did. Besides, I've been down here so long that most of Heaven has forgotten that I even exist." Looking up at Gabriel he said, "But try to get Abner released. He didn't deserve to be down here. Just try to get Abner out. Forget about me." Gabriel couldn't believe that an angel could think so lowly of himself. He was astonished however when Abner moved over to Gadreel and, placing his hand on Gadreel's shoulder, said, "I'm not leaving without you brother. Either we are both set free or neither of us are set free. I will not leave one of us to suffer alone."

Gabriel was astonished at the brotherly love between the two angels. Trapped in hideous conditions, and tortured daily, they had somehow managed to maintain their loyalty to each other, even when offered the chance of freedom. In that moment, Gabriel understood what the meaning of love meant. It meant never truly leaving the person you love, no matter what happens.

Gabriel stood up, brushing off his robe. Suddenly at a loss for what to say, he, somewhat awkwardly, said, "I'm really sorry. For everything that's happened. I'll...I'll try to make it right. And if I can't get you out I'll visit you, as often as I can." Gadreel and Abner nodded, understanding what Gabriel was trying to say. They understood that he desperately wanted to help them but was not confident that even he, as an archangel, one of the most senior beings in Heaven, could get them released. Gabriel smiled sadly at Abner and Gadreel, "I guess this is bye then. I'll come and see you.". Abner and Gadreel nodded sadly, and said together, "Goodbye Gabriel, take care of yourself.". Gabe nodded and turned, walking out of the cell.

* * *

Gabriel stood in Thaddeus' office; a dark room made out of the same cold rough stone. Along the walls hung various instruments of torture, the only decoration' - if you could call them that - in the room. "So, if I understand you correctly Gabriel," Thaddeus said in a smirk, almost disbelieving, voice, "you wish for Abner and Gadreel to be released from their cell?" In a patient, yet irritated, tone Gabriel said, "Yes Thaddeus. That is exactly what I requested." Thaddeus' smirk widened as he asked Gabriel, "You do realise the crimes that they have committed? Especially Gadreel. I mean, he was the one who let Lucifer into Eden and our Father did command for him to be put in here. You are aware of that aren't you Gabriel?"

Gabriel, somehow managing to hold his anger in check, replied, "Yes, I am well aware of that. However, I'm sure God did not command for his sons to be tortured for eternity. After all, isn't he supposed to be a forgiving and loving father?" "I'm sorry Gabriel," Thaddeus replied, not sounding at all sorry, "I cannot release Abner and Gadreel without permission from our Father. Now, if you'll please leave me, I have work to do." With that Thaddeus strode out, leaving a fuming Gabriel standing in the centre of the room.

* * *

Gabe's mind came back to the present, his gaze resting on Cas' face, waiting to see the young angels reaction. Cas, instead of looking horrified had a look of sorrow and understanding, a look which seemed too old on his still young face. Gabriel wished he hadn't told Cas about Heavens prison. Although he knew that Cas must grow up someday, Gabe had wanted him to stay young as innocent for as long as possible.

Cas looked up at Gabe, a question forming, "Have you been to see them lately Gabe?" He asked, "Can I come with you to see them?" Gabe was astonished at Cas' question. Out of everything he could've asked, he was wondering whether Gabe had kept his promise. Guiltily, Gabe realised that he hadn't been to see Abner and Gadreel for quite a while. Since before he became Cas' mentor, actually.

Cas saw Gabe's guilty expression and instantly said, "You need to go see them Gabe," grabbing Gabe's hand and standing up, Cas said, "Come on. Let's go see them." Gabe, shocked at this turn of events, nodded mutely and stood up, following Cas out of the nest.

* * *

Before long they reached the entrance to Heavens dungeons. Holding his hand out in front of Cas, Gabe hesitantly said, "Uh...Maybe this isn't such a great idea Cas. Maybe we should wait until you're a bit older to go in here." Cas looked at Gabe with his big blue eyes. Gabe sighed, why did Cas have to be so damn cute.

Gabe was wondering if Cas was beginning to have second thoughts about coming here. The young angel was walking closer to Gabriel's side, looking around with wide, almost fearful eyes. "It's OK Cas," Gabe murmured, his hand gently brushing throughing Cas' hair, "I'm here with you. I'll make sure that we get through." Cas looked up at Gabe and nodded, believing that his older brother could protect him.

Gabe's feet seemed to lead him towards Abner and Gadreel's cell and before long their cell came into view. Huddled at the back of their cage, Abner and Gadreel seemed much the same as they had when Gabe had visited them so many years earlier. Gabe cleared his throat nervously, and Abner and Gadreel instantly turned around, pressing into the back of their cell, Gadreel, placing himself in front of Abner, but they quickly relaxed when they saw who it was.

Gadreel's brow creased in confusion when he noticed the young angel standing behind Gabe. "Who...Who is that Gabriel?" Gadreel said in confusion, "I don't recall you having any fledglings." Pushing Cas in front of him, so the two angels could see him, Gabriel said, "This is Castiel. He is the youngest angel in Heaven, and the last to be created, of course you two wouldn't know about the new fledglings. I look after Cas and another fledgling called Balthazar. In fact, it's because of those two that we are here today. Cas kinda guilted me into coming here so that he could meet you"

Gadreel stood up and walked over to the door of his cell, "Hello Castiel," he said, "It's nice to meet you." Gabe smiled at Gadreel's greeting and, checking that Thaddeus was not around, zapped the two of them into the cell. Abner still lay against the back of the cell but Gadreel was standing, somewhat unsteadily, opposite Gabe.

Gabe moved his hand off Cas' back and walked towards Abner, kneeling down and letting his grace heal the angel. Cas stood looking up at Gadreel, a look of curiosity in his eyes. Gadreel knelt down slowly, wary of scaring Cas, but was astonished when Cas did not so much as flinch when Gadreel moved towards him. He was sure that the young angel knew what he had done, the unforgivable crime he had committed, however, Cas did not seem repulsed by him, as nearly every other angel was. Instead he seemed curious and sad, an odd mixture, Gadreel thought.

Gadreel and Cas continued to look at each curiously for some time before Gabriel came over and asked it would be OK if he healed him. Gadreel tore his eyes away from Cas' and nodded, feeling a sense of relief as his injuries healed and the pain seeped put of his body. By the time Gabriel had finished, Cas had moved over towards Abner and was sitting with him, talking quitely.

As Gadreel and Gabriel approached the pair, they stopped talking and turned to look at them. Gabriel held out his hand to Cas, "I guess we had better go," he said, "I'm sorry that we can't stay for longer but I need to get back to Balthazar and make sure that he is alright." The two, newly healed, angels nodded and Abner said, "That is a rather remarkable angel you have there Gabriel. Make sure that you look after him." Gabriel nodded and with a hint of a smile, said, "I know. I'll take care of him. I'll try to visit more often and I'll what I can do to get both of you out." The two angels nodded and smiled sadly knowing that Gabe's efforts would likely amount to nothing.

Gabe walked away from the cell, closely followed by Cas. Just before Abner and Gadreel's cell disappeared from sight, Cas and Gabe turned around and gave a small, sad, wave at the two angels standing inside, not knowing when they would see them next.

* * *

Together Gabe and Cas walked back to their nest. Usually, they would fly but Gabe didn't want to risk injuring Cas wings again. As they walked, Gabe noticed the solemn expression on Cas' face and opened his mouth to say something before thinking better of it, he would talk to Cas later. Maybe the young angel just needed some time to process what he had experienced.

Gabe noticed that Cas was beginning to fall behind, his wings drooping behind him. Gabe hurried back to Cas' and picked him up, making sure that his wings were comfortable. Thinking that it would be quicker for him to fly back to the nest, Gabe unfurled his great wings and launched into the air in one powerful swoop.

Gabe observed Heaven from the air as he flew. He was continually astonished that a place which looked so beautiful on the surface could hide such a dark secret. Gabe had often wondered how so many of his siblings could live with the thought that their own brothers and sisters were being tortured. This time, however, he realised that many of the angels did not know about Heaven's prison, and of those who did, even fewer realised what actually occured in it.

* * *

Before long, Gabe arrived at their nest and had to stop sharply when he nearly flew over it, lost in thought. When he landed he laid Cas down gently, making sure that he was comfortable. No sooner had Gabe straightened up, a soft flapping of wings was heard. Gabe turned to see Michael, his elegant white wings tucked behind him, and Balthazar, beside Michael, standing at the edge of his nest.

Balthazar looked considerably calmer today and much more at ease when Michael laid a hand on his shoulder and said, "I thought it was about time that I returned Balthazar to you, Gabe." Looking down and Balthazar, Michael quitely said, "How about you go over and sit with Cas? I need to talk to Gabe for a couple of minutes." Balthazar nodded obediently and hurried over to where Cas was laying. Michael looked at him, "He seems...Much calmer now. Although I don't know what he was afraid of me doing to him," Michael said with a rueful smile. Gabe struggled to hide his smile. As if Michael would punish a young fledgling. He might be a tough soldier, but Gabe knew that he was really a big softy when it came to looking after his baby brothers.

Gabe smiled and said, "Thanks Michael. I appreciate you looking after him when Cas was injured. It should be OK now though. Balthazar seems pretty calm and Cas' wings have healed well, thanks to Raphael." Michael smiled tightly but looked worried, saying, "Balthazar was…overly worried about me punishing him. I feel as if he might have heard some of the stories about our dungeons and what happens there. Not many angels know what it is actually like, so I don't know what he has heard. However, he does know about Abner and Gadreel which is worrying."

Gabriel nodded solemnly, "I know what you are talking about Mickey. I was worried when I heard him talking about that. I will talk to him about it later." Michael nodded, pleased with how his brother his treating the situation, "Maybe just keep it from Cas for a little while longer. I think he is still too young to know about it." Gabe considered telling Michael what that Cas already knew, but decided that Michael didn't need to know that just yet. Nodding, he said, "Of course Mickey. I totally agree with you." Michael nodded and raised his voice slightly, "Bye Balthazar, bye Cas. Hope you feel better soon." Balthazar and Cas turned and looked at the archangel, saying, "Bye Michael," before turning around and talking to each other again. Michael quietly chuckled and said, "Bye Gabe. I'll see you around I suppose." Gabe nodded and waved as his brother launched himself out of the nest.

* * *

Gabe turned around and looked at his two angels, sitting together. Walking over to them he said, "I think you two need to go to sleep now. It's been a long couple of days." Nodding obediently Balthazar and Cas scurried over and laid next two Gabe, their eyes quickly closing. Gabe smiled softly. The last thing he saw before he fell asleep was his two young angels sleeping contentedly by his side.


	11. Fun and Games

Gabe woke up to the sounds of excited laughs and yells. Sitting up, he blinked wearily and rubbed his eyes. "Wha..." he muttered, still half asleep. His eyes focused on Cas and Balthazar and smiled, glad to see his young charges having fun. Balthazar and Cas were chasing each other around the nest, laughing hysterically when they caught each other.

Seeing Gabe awake they let out a shout and pounced on him, their small fingers tickling his side's. Gabe tried to escape their fingers and resisted the urge to laugh. That failed when Balthazar quickly found a spot on Gabe's side which made him break out in a peal of fledgling-like laughter. Gabe laughed harder as their fingers continued to attack their sides. Cas and Balthazar laughs of delight turned to squeals as Gabe picked them up and started to tickle them, attacking their sides and feet, smiling as he saw his baby brothers break out in fits of uncontrollable laughter.

Gabe's fingers eventually slowed and came to rest on Cas and Balthazar's sides. They laid together, gasping for air, their sides aching. How different it was, Gabe thought contentedly, to the pain of a couple of days ago. Not wanting dark thoughts to ruin this happiness, Gabe banished them from his mind, and tried to think of something fun to do with his charges today. Suddenly, a mischievous idea came to mind. He remembered something that he had done with Luci when he was still a fledgling.

"Hey guys..." Gabe started, an idea still forming in his mind, "How would you like to have a bit of fun today?" Seeing their confused yet intrigued expressions, Gabe continued, "I thought that maybe you would like to play some tricks on a few of your brother's and siblings. It's something I did quite often when I was your age," he added with a cheeky smile. Cas and Balthazar looked at each other, a mischievous look coming to their eyes. Turning towards Gabe they nodded eagerly, keen to do something fun. Gabe let out a short bark of laughter, jumping onto the edge of the nest and unfurling his wings, "Well what are we waiting for?"

* * *

Gabe and Balthazar flew towards the centre of Heaven, Cas clutching onto Gabe. Cas had insisted that he was OK to fly but Gabe had refused to let him, afraid that Cas' wings were still too weak to use. Gabe darted above Heaven's streets, laughing when he saw the angels below looking up at him, rolling their eyes. The light cast golden flecks from Gabe's wings onto the watching faces of the angels. Together Gabe and Balthazar slowed down, landing in one of the narrow, empty streets. Gabe's wings brushed the white buildings and shrouded the surrounding area in gold. Gabe and Balthazar quickly tucked their wings away from sight and Gabe knelt down to let Cas get off.

Balthazar and Cas fidgeted impatiently as Gabe stood looking at them, a slight smile on his face. Just when they looked like they would lose what small amount of patience they had, Gabe smiled and said, with a raise of his eyebrows, "What are we waiting for? Let's go play some tricks!" Cas and Balthazar cheered and ran down the alleyway, leaving Gabe staring after them in amusement.

"Sooo…" Gabe said to Cas and Balthazar, "Who do you reckon we prank first? What do you think about Zach?" Cas and Balthazar nodded at each other eagerly and nodded. Zachariah was so boring that it would be fun for them to trick him. "What should we do Gabe?" Balthazar asked, curious as to what his brother had in mind.

"I was just remembering a trick Luci and I played on Michael and I thought it might be a good one," Gabe said, the memory making him smile. "What did you do Gabby? Can we do it?" Cas asked, barely able to contain his excitement. "Patience young one," Gabe said, smiling fondly at his brother, "Of course we can do it if you want but I should probably tell you what it is first! I was thinking that we could change Zach's wings to something a bit more…colourful. He is very vain about his appearance you know." Cas and Balthazar grinned, the mischief in their eyes reflecting that in Gabe's. "Let's go Gabby," Cas exclaimed, running off, pulling on Gabe's arm. "OK, OK, I'm coming. No need to rip my arm off," Gabe said good-humouredly with a small chuckle.

* * *

As Gabe followed his two charges another idea came to him. Despite the original idea that this would just be something fun to do, Gabe thought it might also serve another purpose. Heaven was supposed to be a place of peace but ever since the war, things had become…tense, as if everyone was waiting for something else to happen. His brothers and sisters were still quarrelling and it was starting to wear on Gabe's nerves. He would have left long ago if it wasn't for Cas and Balthazar. He felt an intense loyalty and love towards his two young charges and he didn't think he could bear to leave them…not yet at least. Maybe this bit of fun today would lift everyone's spirits a bit and ease the tension. At least Gabe hoped it would.

Balthazar suddenly stopped and turned towards Gabe, a question forming in his mind. "What's wrong Balth?" Gabe asked, suddenly concerned. Balthazar smiled, "Nothing's wrong Gabe. I was just wondering…what colour did you change Michael's wings to?" Gabe's face split into a relieved smile. Of course Balthazar would ask that. "Well," he started, "I didn't actually change Mickey's wings, Luci did. We thought for ages what colour we should change them to before we decided. We realised that Mickey is um…let's say conservative about his appearance, so we thought that maybe we should make them as similar to his personality as possible. So naturally we made them bright yellow and pink!"

Balthazar burst into a fit of laughter at hearing that, "I can just imagine Michael's face when he found out," he said, still laughing. "It was pretty funny," Gabe admitted, "He couldn't change them back! We had to get dad to do it! Mickey took it pretty well though, surprisingly. I guess he always had a pretty good sense of humour." "Yeah," Balthazar said, a solemn expression on his face, "He's not very happy now though is he?"

Suddenly Balthazar's face lit up. "What have you thought of Balth?" Gabe asked curiously. "I've thought of a way to cheer Michael up," Balthazar responded. Gabe was immediately interested. He hated seeing his older brother the way he was, stressed and exhausted. "I'm in Balth," he said, "What's the plan?"

* * *

By this time Cas had realised that Gabe and Balthazar weren't with him anymore. He looked around, desperately trying to find them, feeling lost without his older brothers. Just as Cas was feeling hopeless and as if he would never find them, another angel walked up to him. The angel had fiery red hair and stormy grey eyes, which at the moment looked kind and caring but also shocked at seeing an angel so young on his own. Cas shrunk back, afraid. The angel, seeing this, knelt down and laid her pastel pink wings on the ground. She spoke quietly to Cas, wary of scaring him further.

"Hey," she said kindly, "Are you OK?" Cas gave a big sob and ran into her arms, wrapping his small arms around her. "Shhh…" she murmured, "it's OK. Why don't you tell me what's wrong?" Cas looked up at her, "Wh-Who are you?" he asked, his bottom lip trembling. "I'm Anna," she said, "And you must be Cas. Where's Gabe?" Cas' lip started to tremble again, "I-I've lost him. I-I can't f-find him or B-balthy."

Anna had a flashback to when she had lost her way in Heaven one day and how remembered how frightened she had been. "Hey, Hey, it's OK," she hushed, stroking Cas' hair, "they'll be around here. I'll help you find them OK?' Cas nodded and Anna picked him up, "Come on, let's go for a fly and see if we can find them. I'm sure they're already looking for you."

* * *

Balthazar had just finished telling Gabe about his idea when Gabe looked around, "Where's Cas," he said, looking concerned. Balthazar felt his blood run cold as his gaze swept over the empty street. "He was here just a minute go Gabe, I swear. He was walking with me and then…and then I came over to you." Balthazar looked ashamed and upset, "It's all my fault…" he began. "No it's not!" Gabe said fiercely, shocking the younger angel, "You didn't do anything wrong. We'll find him. He won't have gone far. He _can't_ have gone far."

Balthazar looked at Gabe desperately, "We will find Cassie won't we?" Gabe, sounding more confident than he felt, replied airily with, "Of course we'll find him Balth. In fact, I bet he's just…" Gabe was suddenly cut off by the fluttering of wings which signified the arrival of an angel. Looking up, he shielded his eyes and squinted at the figure. The angel landed and Gabe noticed her familiar face and smiled. Looking down at her arms, he noticed something which made his smile widen further.

* * *

"Gabe!" Cas cried, leaping out of Anna's arms and running towards Gabe. "Hey Cassie," Gabe murmured, wrapping his arms around Cas, thankful that his young charge was safe. Looking up at the angel standing in front of him, Gabe said, "Hey Anna. It's good to see you again." "You too Gabe," she replied, "I found this little one wandering around, lost. I thought you might want him back, although I would be more than happy to keep him," she said with a rueful grin. "Thanks," Gabe murmured, grateful to the fiery yet kind angel, "It's lucky you found him. Father knows where he might have ended up if you didn't."

"Do you want to come with us Anna?" Cas asked excitedly, squirming his way out of Gabe's arms. Anna raised an eyebrow, a slight smile on her face, "Well that depends little. what are you doing?" "We're going to play tricks on Zach and Mickey and some others," Cas said excitedly. "This wouldn't happen to be your idea would it Gabe? I've heard some rather interesting storied of what you did when you were a fledgling."

Gabe shrugged good-naturedly, "I just thought it would be a bit of fun. Sooo…Would you like to join in?" Anna's face split into a smile, "Sounds like just the thing I need – a bit of fun. I'm in!" Cas cheered and grabbed Anna's arm, pulling her along. Gabe and Balthazar shrugged and set off after them.

* * *

Anna looked down at Cas, amused at how quickly his mood had changed. "Hey Cas," she started, "What's our first trick going to be?" Cas stopped, a confused look on his face. "I don't know," he admitted, "Gabe mentioned something but I didn't hear what it was." Anna smiled, "Well, we should probably find out before we keep going, don't you think." Cas nodded enthusiastically, releasing his grip on Anna's arm. At that moment Gabe and Balthazar walked up to them. "What's wrong guys?" Gabe asked, hoping that something terrible hadn't happened. "Nothing Gabe," Anna replied, "Cas just realised that he didn't know what our first trick was. We thought it would probably be a good idea to ask you."

"Oh," Gabe replied, relieved, "That's easy." Glancing at Balthazar, Gabe continued, saying, "Balth had an idea about what we should do. You want to tell them the plan Balth?" Balthazar looked excited at being asked to explain his idea. "So," he began, "I thought maybe we could change Michael's wing colour to cheer him up a bit. If that's OK with everyone of course," he said glancing around hopefully.

Gabe and Cas looked at Balthazar, nodding their heads in approval. Anna looked doubtful but excite, saying, "That's an ambitious first trick but I guess…I'm in! Let's go prank Michael!" Cas and Balthazar took off down the street, eager to have a bit of fun with Gabe and Anna following behind them at a more respectable pace.

* * *

Before long, the group of angels had reached the area where Michael's office was located. They had passed a couple of angels and had nodded respectfully at them, never stopping to chat. "OK," Gabe said in a low voice, "I'll go in first and distract Mickey. Balthazar you sneak in behind me with Cas. Anna, I want you to go in when I walk out and come up with something to get Mickey out of his office. Then, hopefully, everyone will see his wings. Cas and Balthazar, you sneak out with Anna and…make Mickey's wings as crazy as possible. Everyone got it?" Cas, Balthazar and Anna all nodded in agreement. "OK, let's go," Gabe said, already heading towards the door.

* * *

Michael looked up when he heard his door slam open. "Gabriel, what's wrong?" he asked, concerned. Gabe rarely came into his office when he was working – which seemed to be most of the time these days – unless it was an emergency. Gabe didn't look concerned though, just sheepish and slightly…mischievous, Michael thought. "So sorry to disturb you Mickey," Gabe said, "but, ah, I was just wondering if you would be able to look after Balth and Cas tomorrow. I have some messages to deliver and I'm not game to leave them on their own after what happened last time." Michael visibly relaxed, "Of course Gabe," he said, waving his hand, "That's fine. Was there anything else you wanted?" "No that's all. I'll let you get back to work now," Gabe said, turning and walking out the door, trying not to laugh at Michaels' new wing colour.

Michael sighed. He was looking forward to this distraction, if only he could get through today. He was starting to settle into his new job but he was still finding it difficult to look after all of Heaven without the guidance of his father.

Suddenly his door slammed open again and Anna rushed in. Looking ashamed at her undignified entrance, Anna bowed her head and respectfully said, "Oh Michael, can you please come out here and help us. There is a fight between some of the angels and we cannot stop it. Michael, who had always had a soft spot for the fiery red-haired angel, stood up hurriedly saying, "Of course I will go Anna. Thank you for telling me."

Michael rushed out of the room and flew into the air, not seeing Gabe hiding nearby. Anna, Cas and Balthazar, ran out of the office and met Gabe, tears of laughter running down their faces. "Ahhh, I haven't laughed so hard in a long time," Anna said clutching her sides. "I guess we had better go find Michael and explain what's happened," Gabe said when he had managed to get some control back, "I'm sure plenty of angels will have seen him by now."

* * *

Gabe was indeed correct. Numerous angels had seen Michael and after the initial shock had worn off, they had found it hard to stop themselves from laughing. Michael was getting more confused and irritated as he flew one. Where was this fight that Anna was talking about. He hadn't seen anything which remotely resembled a fight anywhere, in fact Heaven looked perfectly calm, as it should be. And why were all the angels laughing? They weren't laughing at him surely?

Michael swiftly turned around when he heard an angel behind him. To his surprise he saw not one but four angels hovering behind him. Gabe, Anna, Cas and Balthazar were all floating in the air with idiotic grins pasted on their faces. "What?" Michael snapped, irritated, "What is so funny?" Gabe smiled, struggling to hold his laughter in, "Oh nothing Mickey. You might just want to…check your wings."

Looking confused at Gabe's statement, Michael hesitantly turned his head around and looked at his wings, gasping in shock when he saw them. "Wha-," Michael said, stuttering in shock, "What have you done Gabriel?" Gabe laughed, "Relax Mickey, we can change them back. I swear it's not as bad as when I was a fledgling…remember?"

Michael looked confused for a second, trying to work out what Gabe meant. Upon remembering, however, a grin slowly made its' way across his face. All of a sudden, Michael burst out laughing and the others faces relaxed, laughing with him. When Michael managed to stop laughing, he said breathlessly, "Thank you Gabriel. I haven't laughed like that in quite a while." Gabe smiled back, thankful that his brother was happy, and replied "It's not just me that you need to thank Mickey. Anna, Cas and Balthazar also need to be thanked. Balth and Cassie especially. I mean, they were the ones who actually changed your wings. Anna and I were just distractions."

Michael, still smiling, looked down at the two younger angels and said, "Thank you so much for making me laugh. Now, do you think I should change my wings back or should I leave them?" Cas and Balthazar looked at each. "I'd like for them to stay," said Balthazar with a grin, "but I doubt they will, they're fading already!" Michael looked at them, feigning shock, "So they are!" he said, "Well I suppose I'll just have to keep my normal wings then."

Gabe smiled at Michael and cheekily said, "I can always organise for you to keep those wings if you want Michael…" Grinning at his younger brother, Michael said, "No it's OK Gabe. My normal wings are quite fine." Gabe laughed, "OK Mickey. But if you ever change your mind…I'm quite willing to do it and you know where to find me!"

Michael laughed at Gabe's offer, "Thanks again Gabe but I'll pass." Sighing, he said, "No I suppose I should get back to work…unless there are any more 'fights' to attend to? I assume this won't be the only trick today?" Wiggling his eyebrows, Gabe said, "I don't know Mickey. I guess you'll just have to wait and see!" Michael smiled once again, amused at his younger brothers' attitude, "I guess I will Gabe." Pretending to look angry he said, "Now clear off and leave me alone! I have work to do you know!" Gabe laughed and waved his hand, "See ya Mickey," he said before turning to fly away, "Don't work too hard!" Michael shook his head, grinning, and waved at the four angels who were now flying off towards the centre of Heaven.

* * *

Gabe, Anna, Cas and Balthazar had continued to play numerous tricks throughout the day with the younger angels doing most of the pranking. Gabe thought they'd had a pretty good day. After they had pranked Michael, they had also tricked Zachariah, Ezekiel, Hannah and many more. They had done everything from hiding stuff that the angels needed, to calling out their names and then hiding. They had also zapped numerous angels to different parts of Heaven and had, of course, changed the wing colour of others.

By late afternoon the majority of the angels had either been pranked themselves or knew about the tricks. Gabe would have been more than happy to keep going but looking down at Cas and Balthazar he changed his mind. The two young angels were hanging behind Gabe and Anna, their wings drooping, their feet dragging. Gabe cursed himself for not noticing their exhaustion earlier. Of course they would be tired, he thought, they had been using their grace all day and unlike fully-grown angels, fledglings only had a limited amount of grace. Cas looked even more exhausted than Balthazar. He was a younger angel and the day would have taken a lot out of him, draining his grace steadily until he had almost none left.

Nudging Anna, Gabe murmured, "Hey Anna, I think we'd better head back to the nest. Cas and Balth are looking pretty exhausted." Anna turned around and seeing what Gabe meant, she nodded and hurried towards the younger angels, Gabe following closely behind her.

* * *

"Hey you two," Anna said, bending down and looking into the tired eyes of the young angels, "Do you reckon we head back to the nest now? You look pretty exhausted." Cas and Balthazar nodded tiredly. Anna reached out and scooped Cas up into her arms, adjusting her hold to ensure that he was comfortable. Cas layed his head on Anna's shoulder and closed his eyes. Gabe had picked up Balthazar and, after struggling with his weight - he was growing up so quickly - he decided to carry Balthazar on his back.

Once the younger angels were safely in place, Gabe and Anna flew into the air in one massive rush of wind. Gabe and Anna urged themselves forward, eager to reach their nest and to let Cas and Balthazar sleep peacefully and recover their grace.

* * *

Before long, the nest came into view, distinguishing itself from its surroundings as the angels drew nearer. Anna and Gabe landed elegantly on the edge of it, the beating of their wings slowing to a stop. Once inside the nest Anna and Gabe knelt down and gently laid Cas and Balthazar onto the ground. The two, now sleeping angels, snuggled closer, wrapping their wings around each other.

"I guess I had better go back to my best now," Anna said. "You'll want to get some peace and quiet, not to mention rest, before they were up." Gabe nodded hesitantly, "You don't have to go. You could stay here tonight. If you want to, I mean." Anna nodded and smiled softly, "I'd love that Gabe. There's very few fledglings left and these two… Well, they're something special." Gabe smiled back at Anna, laying down, "They definitely are something. Goodnight Anna." "Goodnight Gabe," Anna replied, laying down and closing her eyes.

* * *

As the sky darkened above Heaven, turning from a golden yellow to a dark indigo and then to a deep twilight blue, four angels slept soundly in a nest, enjoying each other's company and the memories of a happy day, the likes of which would become further and further apart.

 **Note:** First of all, thank you to everyone who reads and reviews this! It means a lot to me. This is a bit of a fun chapter after the seriousness of the previous few. Sorry for putting this one up a bit late, I wasn't feeling very creative. The gap between each chapter might be a bit longer than at first because I'm running out of ideas and school is starting again tomorrow. I'll try to update regularly though! Again, if you have anything you would like for me to write about in this story or any suggestions on what I can improve, let me know!


	12. A Moment in Time

Long before Earth, before any monsters or humans, there existed only three beings. The light, the darkness and Death. But there was soon going to be a fourth added. The first created being. The first archangel. The first child of God. The protector of Heaven.

God looked down at the ball of grace swirling in his hands. What he created with this could change the course of existence one day. Despite what his sister - the darkness - might think, he was nervous. He had never before created anything and he could only hope that this child of his would be good. Slowly, with a delicate touch, God began to form his eldest child.

The first, and most delicate, part of creation was the formation of the soul. Each one was unique, a reflection of the beings' character. To form his son's soul, God combined traits of loyalty, leadership and strength, amongst others. His child would be a brave soldier and leader one day. After finishing the soul, God proceeded to create the rest of the body, marvelling at how the ball of grace moulded into the form of a child under his hands.

Finally, God had nearly finished creating the archangel. The only part left was his wings. After the soul, this was the most delicate part of the creation. God paused for a moment, considering what colour the wings should be. Grabbing a pure white cloud, God formed it into a set of six grand wings, long and elegant, symbolising the light and power of Heaven that this child would one day represent.

Standing back, God looked down at his work, pleased at what he had accomplished. Now, only one thing was left to be done. God leaned down and placed his mouth over his eldest child small lips and gently breathed life into him, marvelling at the colour which flooded into his skin and the light that ignited in his eyes.

"Hello Michael," he said.

 **Note:** Sorry for the long wait, I haven't been feeling very creative lately. These next couple of chapters will just be short ones about some of the angels being created/when they were very young. Anyway, I hope you like it!


	13. One Day

For many, what would one day be considered Earth, years now, God had enjoyed the company of his oldest son, Michael. The young archangel had kept him busy with his grace slowly maturing and his desire to fly, causing the overeager angel to gain many bruises and scrapes. Not that it deterred him. Michael seemed more and more excited to fly and to work with him every day. His oldest child was now nearly three and God had decided that it was time for a new angel to be created. After all, Heaven needed more than one angel to survive. One day it would need an army. It would need thousands of angels who protected their home, their family and the world.

His oldest son would one day grow up to be the protector and leader of Heaven and its mission, but his second-oldest could not be more different. This child would ruin Heaven and mankind but he would have a reason. One that, although it mightn't be right, he believed in. God hated the idea that he was creating a child that would be destined to suffer so much pain and suffering, but it had to be done. Every creation would have its place in the universe and each and every one of them would have their own part to play, no matter how small or large it would be. This child, however, would play a very large part in the shaping of the world. Very few of his creations would know what this child was truly like.

* * *

God had managed to get Michael to go to sleep, something which seemed to happen very occasionally. Usually he would have revelled in the quietness and calm which ensued when Michael fell asleep but today he had work to do. He was sure that once he created his second child, he would never have a quiet moment again. Carefully, God held the swirling ball of light blue grace in his hands. The grace twisted between his fingers, covering his hands in a light, shimmering blue. He felt more confident now that he had made an angel, however he was still nervous, and he doubted that that feeling would ever leave him. How could you not be nervous when you held something's life in your hands? How could you not be nervous when you were about to shape everything about your child? Their soul, their grace, their future. He had to be careful. He had to make sure he got everything just right. Although this child would one day suffer for what he would do, God wanted him to still be happy while he was growing up. He still wanted his child to have morals which would guide his path. And he must make sure that those morals would lead his child down the path that would follow the plan which has been set in place for millennia already. One day, not too far into the future, he would need this child, and his other siblings, to defend the newly formed Heaven from the wrath of his sister. And me must make sure that this child was made just right to follow his set path in life.

This child would be loyal to his family, strong-willed and fierce. He would be a warrior, a protector of his family - of his father. He would love with all of his heart or hate with every part of his being. His wings, a glorious red, which would one day be speckled with black, would provoke fear into others hearts. This child already held a special place in his heart. To the other angels, for a short time he would be seen as the best angel. He would be beautiful, a skilled fighter and powerful. But his undying loyalty to his father and his family would one day be the undoing of him. In the future, this child would go from being the most loved to the most despised. Very few humans would ever know what this child was truly created to be like. God felt a flare of protectiveness as this thought occurred to him. No one would know what his second oldest child would be like, so he must keep the perfect memory of him safe within himself.

One day, this child's name would become synonymous with darkness and evil, but few would realise that his name actually meant 'light-bringer'. One day, he would be a being feared by all who heard his name, but today, he was a child nestled in his father's arms, looking up at him with loving blue eyes, partially covered by the mess of golden blonde hair which flopped over his face. The young angel reached up his chubby arms towards his father's face and smiled happily, his blue eyes crinkling up. What would happen in the future didn't matter now. All that mattered was that this child, his child, was nestled safely in his arms.

God looked down at his newest creation and smiled. He wasn't supposed to have favourites - but this one had scored a special place in his heart. How could it not be, when this child would one day sacrifice everything to remain loyal to him? He had to treasure this child while he still had him close. While he was still pure and uncorrupted and loving towards his father. God stroked the child's hair quietly and listened to the unintelligible noises he was making with a quiet smile on his face. Looking over at where Michael had been sleeping, he saw to his surprise that his oldest was sitting up, wide awake, not making a sound. Michael was wearing an expression which looked unusually old for his young features. He beckoned Michael over to him and the angel climbed onto his lap and sat there quietly, pressing up against his father. God pressed a kiss into his eldest's head and smiled softly, murmuring, "Hello Lucifer. Michael and I are very happy to meet you."

* * *

 **Author's note:** Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews this! It means a lot to me to hear what you all think about the story!


	14. The Messenger

It had numerous years since an angel was created in Heaven. Michael was now around 14 years old, Lucifer was 11 and Raphael had just turned 8. The days had begun to blend together, with nothing significant to separate them. Today, however, was a special day. A new angel was to be created. The last of the archangels and the future messenger of God. Today, the angel named Gabriel was to be created.

God had managed to separate himself from his children, leaving Michael in charge. He had told them that today was a special day but he had not told them why. As he made his way towards a quiet place, he thought about what his last archangel would be like.

Gabriel would be unique, as all angels were. He would be funny yet fierce and protective. He would love his family, so much so that, in the far distant future, he would do prefer to leave rather than fight his brothers. Gabriel would be a fierce warrior and a fast flier, yet he would also be kind and caring, a trait that would serve him well in the future. And, just like his older brother Lucifer, he would be granted a strong sense of free will. One day, God sensed that his youngest archangels sense of humour and undying loyalty would serve him well. Realising that he had been daydreaming, God shook himself and set to work on the laborious task of building an archangel.

When God finally looked up again, he was surprised at how long he had been working. The sky was fading outside, brilliant golds and red streaking across it, breaking the uniform blue sky which shone every day in Heaven. Feeling slightly guilty at how long he had left his children alone, God hurried his work, finishing the final part of his youngest archangel – the wings.

As the messenger of God, Gabriel would have to be a quick flier. Keeping this in mind, God shaped Gabriel's wings differently to his older brothers. Although Gabriel still had the six wings, the typical mark of an archangel, his wings were longer and thinner and were a dazzling gold, which shone like gleaming metal in the light and sent specks of colour across the room.

God looked down at the young archangel, satisfied with what he saw. Gently he leant down and breathed life into the small child, smiling softly as Gabriel's eyes fluttered open, revealing deep, amber coloured orbs. At that moment, God heard a knocking at the door and turned to see his three children.

He quickly opened the door and they rushed in full of chatter, but falling silent when they saw the small shape in their Fathers' arms. "Dad," Michael asked, "Is that…" "Yes Michael," God replied, "meet your new brother. His name is Gabriel."

 **Note:** Thanks for all those who have stuck with my story and kept reading it, even when I have breaks between chapters. I'm not too happy with this chapter but I thought I should post something. I probably won't post anything for the next three weeks as I am busy with exams, however feel free to leave ideas and comments! Thanks again for reading!


	15. The First

For many years, Heaven had flourished in a state of perfection. After banishing the darkness, God had begun to make new beings. His angels. There had been so many already created – Anna, Gadreel, Naomi, just to name a few. All the fledgling angels were looked after by the older angels. Up until now, the archangels had not taken care of an angel fledgling – it wasn't their role. But this fledgling would be different. He would be one of the last created and he would be the first to be cared for by an archangel – by Gabriel.

God felt that his oldest son needed to find his purpose. Sure, one day he would be the messenger of God but that day was still a long way off. All his brothers had their purpose – Michael and Lucifer assisted in running Heaven and Raphael was the healer of Heaven. God hoped that this fledgling would help Gabriel in realising that he was important, that he was needed in Heaven.

As he had done so many times before, God prepared to start making a new being. Every being was different, but this fledgling would share some of his traits with his older brother. His soul came first – a bright one, full of mischief and fun, but also one full of loyalty and love. Next his body, sandy blonde hair and blue eyes, an impish smile. Lastly his wings. Long and elegant, much like that of Gabriel's and a shimmering, pure silver which reflected the light, casting small, diamond flecks of light around him.

Pulling his hands away, God looked with satisfaction at this new fledgling. He was sure Gabriel would like him. After all, it was his destiny to look after this fledgling.

Gabriel was walking through the lonely part of Heaven, content with only the company of his own thoughts, when he heard his Fathers voice ring out in his head. "Gabriel," he said, "I have something for you. You know where to meet me."

Gabe stood perfectly still, surprised that his Father had taken the time to talk to him, surprised that his Father had something – whatever it was – for him. Shaking off the surprise, Gabe unfurled his long wings and took off into the air.

As Gabriel flew, his long wings pushing him through the air, oblivious to the angels below, staring up at him in awe, he pondered what his Father could possibly want. Surely he hadn't done anything wrong. And he was nothing special, he wasn't like his older brothers, critical to the functioning of Heaven. So, what could his Father want?

Landing gracefully on the steps of the sacred building, a place where only archangels could enter, Gabriel felt a ripple of fear course through him. Tugging his robe closer to him, he hurried up the stairs into the building.

God heard a soft, almost hesitant, knock on the door and he smiled to himself as he imagined his son standing outside. "Come in," he said, tucking the fledgling out of sight. Slowly the door opened and the youngest archangel stepped in, his light brown hair messy from the flight, his golden eyes lowered. Seeing Gabriel hesitate in the doorway, God realised just how out of place Gabriel felt in Heaven. "Come in Gabriel. You don't need to be afraid." Gabriel looked up into his Fathers eyes and moved swiftly over to his desk, taking a seat. "You're probably wondering why I called you here today," God started, "Well, I have something important for you to take care of."

Gabriel walked out of the building, his head spinning, a smile on his face and a bundle in his arms. Him, a guardian. He couldn't believe that his Father had entrusted him with the care of a small fledgling. A fledgling that would one day help to shape the future. A fledgling so much like himself. A fledgling named Balthazar.


	16. The Last

It was just before the creation of Earth and God's work in Heaven was almost done. Many of the angels had grown up, his archangels had developed into strong leaders and the fledglings were all being safely cared for. There was only one thing left for him to make. The last angel. Arguably the most important, although his role wouldn't be needed for many years, not that anyone else knew that.

The last of his kind, this angel would be one unlike any other. His sould, bright and strong, full of love, loyalty and strenght. But also full of free will, innocence and compassion. This angel would be one of the only ones to remember His message, long after He was gone.

As God crafted his last fledgling he smiled as he thought about what this angel would someday do. The soul finished, God set to work on the fledglings outward appearance. Messy black hair and sparkling eyes made of the most intense blue, a tan trenchcoat wrapped around the angels white robe.

All too soon, the last angel was nearly finished, only one thing left to do. The wings, the final part of any angel. God paused for a second, thinking back over his angels, the successes and the failures. Smiling a little, he set to work crafting the last fledglings wings.

Long and sleek, to help the angel in his future mission. A deep black, grabbed from the darkest parts of the universe with small streaks of a dark blue, just visible if you looked closely enough. Sure, they were different to the other angels but one day they would serve this fledgling well.

The fledgling completed, God should have simply breathed life into him and handed him over to a willing angel carer. But this last fledgling was different. God had one particular angel - one particular archangel - which he wanted to care for this fledgling. And this archangel would find him, seemingly alone, but really Gods grace would be with him, as it always would be, for this last angel was special.

* * *

Gabe walked alone, on an empty, winding pathway. He had left Balthazar with Anna for a little bit, needing some time to clear his head. His little fledgling-like was growing so quickly and he felt insanely proud of him. But yet, he still worried. The other angel whispered, wondering why an archangel would be given the job of looking after a fledgling. Gabe tried to ignore them, but sometimes the whispers still snuck into his brain.

Higher and higher the path wound, the air growing cool. Suddenly Gabe's ears detected a soft whimpering sound that could only belong to a fledgling. Wondering how and why a fledgling would be up here, Gabe hurried his steps moving towards the sound.

As he rounded the next corner, a small tan coloured bundle came into view and the source of the whimpering became clear. A tiny new fledgling wrapped in a tan trenchcoat lay on the snow, soy whimpers escaping his mouth.

Gabe hurriedly picked him up, holding him close to his chest. As he looked down at the fledglings face he murmured, "now, what are we going to call you little one?" Suddenly a voice boomed through Gabe's head, a voice he knew too well, the voice of his father. "His name is Castiel," he said, "he will be important one day. Look after him Gabriel."

Just as suddenly as it had started, his Father's voice faded into silence. Gabe looked down on his young fledgling, "little angel of Thursday are we?" Smiling gently down, caught in Castiels blue eyes, Gabe said, "well, let's get you home and you can meet your new brother."


	17. Fallen Feathers

Gabe woke up to the sound of groaning and whimpering. Thinking that it must be Cas, Gabe rolled over and opened his eyes, dread flooding through his body To his surprise, he found the cause of the noise to be coming, not from Cas, but from Balthazar.

A fleeting sense of relief passed through him, followed by an instant worry at what was causing his young, silver winged brother so much pain.

Moving carefully, so as not to disturb Balthazar, Gabe moved over to his younger brothers side. Balthazar looked up weakly when he felt a hand on his arm and Gabe gave a start as he looked at him.

Balthazar's face was pale and covered in a glistening sweat. His body was shaking, curling up occasionally as pain wracked through him. Looking past Balthazar's body, Gabe looked at his wings and realised immediately what was happening.

The, usually shimmering, silver wings were missing several feathers, leaving bald spots of red irritated skin where they had once been. The remainder of the feathers were ruffled and dull looking. Balthazar gingerly held his wings away from both his body and the ground, as if afraid that anything which touched them would hurt.

By this time, the noise, which was growing progressively louder, had woken up the youngest angel. Cas rose from the spot where he had been sitting and padded over to Gabe, plonking down beside him. "What's wrong with Balth?" Cas asked, obviously curious at why his brother was not in his usual high spirits, "What's wrong with him Gabby? What's wrong with Balths wings?"

Gabe looked down at the young angel and sighed, a slight smile tugging at his lips. He could deal with this. "He's molting Cas," he replied, "don't worry, he'll be ok." Cas furrowed his brows, biting at his lip, "he doesn't look ok." Pulling Cas towards him, Gabe rested his head on his younger brothers, a hand snorting his wings, "trust me Cas. Balthazar is fine, I'm going to help him.". Cas nodded, his implicit trust in his older brother reassuring him.

Gabe looked down at Balthazar's body, still curled up. Surely, he could fix this, he was an archangel. A thought tugged at the back of Gabe's mind. He had never had to deal with a moulting fledgling before. When he was young, his older brothers had dealt with his wings, and Balthazar was his first fledgling.

Gently, hesitantly, Gabe laid his hand onto Balthazar's wings, feeling a twinge of guilt when his younger brother pulled away from him. Trying to quieten his younger brother, Gabe let his grace flow through is body and around Balthazar's wings. He watched, hopeful as the grace twined around them. Reassuring himself that he knew what to do. As the grace faded away, Gabe held his breath as he pulled away his hands. A sinking feeling dropped into his stomach as he saw that Balthazar's wings were no better.

Again, Gabe tried, becoming increasingly more desperate with his attempts to heal his brother, but all to no avail. Cas, watched on in curious silence, wondering what his older brother was trying to do.

Gabe felt hopeless. He was an archangel, one of the most powerful beings and he couldn't even help his younger brother with a simple case of moulting. What sort of archangel was he? He was useless, not even able to do the simplest of tasks. He hadn't wanted it to come to this, but he had no other choice. He had to go get help from his brothers.

* * *

Gently, Gabe scooped Balthazar up, into his arms, making sure that his wings were comfortable. Looking at Cas, he said, "C'mon Cassie. We're going to go see Michael." Cas nodded and walked towards the edge of the nest, his wings extending behind him. "Uh, Cas. Are you sure that you'll be ok to fly? I could carry you if you want?" Cas shook his head, a defiant look in his eyes, "I'm fine Gabby. And you've got Balthazar, anyway." Gabe looked at Cas for a second before nodding and stepping of the edge of their nest.

Before long, they head reached the building where the archangels, except for Gabe, spent most of their time. It was in the centre of Heaven, a glorious, shining white building, made out of the finest marble. Gabe landed elegantly on the front step, Cas less so, nearly falling over as he landed, bringing a wry smile to Gabe's face. Taking a deep breath to steel himself, Gabe turned and walked inside, Cas following close behind him.

* * *

Michael heard a set footsteps, no, two sets of footsteps walking towards his door. One heavy and one light, almost impossible to hear. His brow creased as he wondered who could be coming to see him. Surely, he hadn't told anyone to come? Suddenly, the footsteps stopped and in that moment of silence, Michael sensed the hesitation of whoever it was. "Come in," he said, "who is it?" Slowly, the door eased open and Michael saw the disheartened face of Gabriel. "What's wro-" Michael's gaze fell upon the sickly-looking bundle in Gabe's arms. "What's wrong with Balthazar, Gabe? Has he hurt himself?"

"Not exactly, Mickey. He-he's only moulting, but I," Gabe hesitated for a second, before the words came pouring out in a rush, "I didn't know how to fix him. And he was in so much pain." His voice lowered, ashamed, "I thought that you would know how to help, because Dad knows, I don't know what to do."

"Oh Gabe," Michael said softly, "Of course I will help. In fact, I'll call Raphael, he knows what to do better than I do." Gabe nodded, glad that his brother was going to help him.

* * *

Before long, they heard another set of footsteps hurrying along the corridor, this set confident and sharp. The door of the room opened and Raphael walked in, his eyes scanning over Balthazar. "Why is it always one of your charges that is injured Gabriel? I swear to Dad, I spend more time patching up you three than any other angel combined." Gabe lowered his head, feeling even more ashamed. Michael, seeing this, cut in saying, "Now, Raphael, Gabriel does his best to look after Castiel and Balthazar, and they aren't injured that much." Raphael saw the look in Michael's eyes and realised what his brother was trying to do.

Taking a deep breath, he walked towards Gabe and said, his voice marginally softer, "What's wrong with Balthazar, Gabriel?" Gabe looked up, "He-he's just moulting, but I didn't know what to do." Raphael nodded curtly and gestured towards the table, which sat in the corner of Michael's office. "Put him down over there and I'll have a look at him." Gabe started into action and hurried towards the table, laying Balthazar down. Cas followed behind him and swiftly flew up onto the table and sat beside Balthazar.

"Hey Cassie, get down from there. You have to let Raphael do his work." Cas obstinately shook his head and refused to move. "I'm not leaving Balth," he said. Gabe looked at Michael and shrugged helplessly. "Leave him there," Michael said, "He's not hurting anyone."

Raphael walked towards Balthazar and Gabe stepped away, standing beside Michael. Slowly, Raphael inspected Balthazar, his hands running gently over his wings. Michael nudged Gabe, whispering, "How about you go up there and see what Raphael is doing. Then you'll know what to do next time."

Hesitantly, Gabe walked towards Raphael, coming to a standstill, when he was next to him. Raphael made no sign of acknowledgement, simply focusing his attention on Balthazar. Lifting his hands slightly, grace began to flow out of Raphael's hands and settled into a blue mist around Balthazar's wings. Raphael began speaking in Enochian, the familiar language triggering a memory in Gabriel's mind from when he was young.

* * *

Before too long, the grace receded and Balthazar's wings were back to their normal, gleaming silver. Raphael looked up, acknowledging Gabe for the first time. "He will be alright now, although he will probably just want to sleep."

Gabe nodded, trying to remember everything that Raphael had done. Stammering slightly, Gabe said, "thank you – again – for everything Raphael and you too Michael. I-I don't know what I would do without you." Raphael nodded and Michael smiled, replying, "That's ok Gabriel. We're your brothers and we're always here to help."

Gabe opened his mouth to say something else, before closing it and walking out the door, Balthazar in his arms, Cas following close behind.

* * *

Michael stared thoughtfully at the door. "Does Gabriel seem…different to you?" Raphael looked confused, "No, I can't see anything different Michael. Why?" "He just, doesn't seem like himself," Michael replied, turning to look at Raphael. "Would-would you like me to keep an eye on him for a while?" Raphael asked. "I think that would be a good idea for now," Michael answered slowly.

Raphael nodded slowly, assuming Michael must have a reason for his worry. He turned and headed for the door, closing it softly behind him.

Michael sat at his desk in contemplative silence, thinking about Gabriel. No, he definitely didn't seem right he realised. He would have to watch over him for a bit.

* * *

In the meantime, Gabriel had arrived back at his nest and laid Balthazar down to rest, Cas curling up beside him. Gabe looked down at his two charges and felt a pang of nostalgia as he remembered when they had both been small enough to fit inside the crook of his arm. He kept telling himself that he would never leave the two of them, but now, he was unsure.

He felt as if he didn't have a place in Heaven. He was useless. A poor excuse for an archangel. He loved his family but he didn't think that he could stand to live with their fighting and false smiles any longer. Soon, Balthazar and Cas would be grown up. And soon, he would no longer be their carer. Soon, he would have no purpose. Maybe soon, he would leave. Soon, but not yet.

* * *

 **Authors Note:** Hi everyone, sorry for taking so long to post this chapter. School has been crazy with exams and when I did get around to writing it, my computer deleted the completed chapter. Anyway, hope you enjoy and thanks again for reading it!


	18. Bring Back What Once Was Ours

Another day had broken in Heaven, if you could call it that. The air was still, angels still in their nests. Words hung unspoken in the air, ready to be plucked out and thrown into conversations. But in the unbroken stillness, a lone figure approached through the golden haze. He stood, back hunched over, wings drooping, robe loosely draped over him. As Gabriel approached he gave of a sense of a once powerful being, now reduced to a defeated, dejected mess.

He had been walking for some time now, leaving his nest with Cas and Balthazar still safely asleep inside it. He didn't know where he was going or what he was going to do, he just knew that he needed to walk, to think. Sure, things hadn't been great in Heaven for some time now but Gabriel couldn't ignore the lingering sense of emptiness and despair which occupied his waking thoughts.

As he strayed further and further from the centre of Heaven, the buildings began to become sparse and showed visible signs of neglect and disrepair. This part of Heaven hadn't been used for many years now, not since long before the war. The last time some of these buildings had been used was when Heaven was once in peace. Still, Gabe kept walking. He couldn't seem to stop, his feet wandering with his thoughts.

Suddenly, as if out of nowhere, he pulled up short, stopping in front of another dilapidated building. Although at first glance it looked the same as all the others, when you looked at again you noticed a sense of elegance, of power which used to surround the building. The building, hidden under twisted, green vines was made up of a regal white marble.

The building for so many years now had been ignored, forgotten by those who had once worshipped and stood in awe of it. But as Gabriel stood in front of it, a sense of nostalgia filled him. This building was the one where he had spent countless hours with his older brothers and father. This building was the old archangels building. The one where they resided while Heaven was still at peace. After the war, the building had been neglected, left to waste away into nothing but a place of memories.

Gabe shook himself from his thoughts and slowly walked up the steps, resting his hand on the cool marble door, hesitating a second. Did he dare to go in? Was he ready to confront the memories he might face in there?

"What do I have to lose?" he said, pushing the door open. Slowly, it eased open, a stale smell escaping from the building.

Gabe peered into the building, watching the long settled dust swirl in the sunlit hall. The dust had created patterns where it had settled upon the windowsills when the building was closed. Tentatively, he stepped into the hall, hearing his steps echoing off the marble.

Gabe wandered through the building peering into long abandoned rooms, their uses long forgotten by most. Rooms containing dusty weapons, rooms filled with old, yellowed paper documents and much more. Gabe pushed open another door and looked in. What he saw stopped and made him stare. It was in this room that some of his best memories had come from. This was the room where the archangels, and later Cas and Balthazar, relaxed in.

* * *

"Where are we going Gabby?" Cas and Balthazar clamoured anxiously. "Why are we here? Where is everyone?" Gabe rolled his eyes, these two really did have no chill.

"Just wait," he said, " you'll find out in a second. We're just going to have a bit of fun with Mike, Raph and Luce today."

Cas and Balthazar opened their mouths to ask more questions but shut them when Gabe shushed them. They had arrived at another seemingly nondescript door and had stopped before it. Gently, Gabe pushed the door open, revealing a room where his three older brothers were sitting talking. Cas and Balthazar rushed into the room, talking excitedly to the older archangels. Gabe gave a helpless look, shrugging his shoulders before walking in and shutting the door.

Walking into the room, Gabe collapsed into a chair next to Lucifer.

"But of a handful little brother?" He asked. "Sort of like what you were like growing up."

Gabe grumbled and rolled his eyes thinking that surely he couldn't have been this excitable when he was a fledgling. "What are we doing today anyway?" He asked.

"Michael had the use that we could create some animals to put on Dad's new creation," Lucifer drawled.

"Dad's letting us put stuff on Earth?" Gabe asked in astonishment. "But that's his most valued creation."

"I know," Lucifer replied, "it should be sort of fun anyway. When those two young ones finally calm down."

* * *

Gabe led Cas and Balthazar over to the table where his older brothers were sitting and told them what they were going to do. They happily settled down to it and Gabe sighed in relief at the decrease in noise. After making sure that Cas and Balthazar were okay, Gabe started making his own animal, gluing parts together with his grace. What was created could only be described as a little strange. The animal had a long, fur covered body with four, short, leathery, webbed feet protruding from it. In addition to this, it had a long, flat tail and a beak like mouth.

Michael looked over at Gabe's creation and exclaimed, "My word Gabriel, what is that?"

Gabe looked over at Michael's creation and snorted at the difference. His older brother had made a sleek white bird with an elegant long neck. Raphael had also made a sleek looking, spotted animal with powerful legs. His creation could not be more different. "I don't know Michael. I think it's kinda cute though. And I was thinking of calling it the platypus."

"Hey Mickey what do you think of mine?" Lucifer asked playfully holding up his creation. To Gabe it looked like a long noodle with two eyes and a forked tongue.

"What exactly is that Luce?" Gave asked in confusion.

"I'm going to call it a snake. It's venomous, can unhinge it's jaw and just slithers around everywhere. Isn't it cool?" Lucifer said excitedly

"Yeah it's.. awesome Luce." "What did you make Cas and Balthazar?" Gabe asked changing the topic.

Balthazar held up his creation which looked like a slightly modified version of Lucifers animal. It had stumpy legs and a fatter, more leathery body.

"I made this Gabe," he said proudly, "I'm gonna call it a lizard."

"That's great Balthazar! It looks awesome!" Gabe said smiling. "And what about you Cas," he asked the smallest Angel, "What did you make?"

Cas shyly held up his creation. It was a small insect with a round, fuzzy body stripes with yellow and black. On it's back were two small wings which did not look like they were capable of supporting the animals weight.

"This is my animal," Cas said, "I'm going to call it a Bumblebee."

Gabe had to admit that out of all the weird, elegant and powerful creations, Cas' was definitely the cutest. "I think it looks incredible Cas," Gave said smiling at the young Angel. "You did a very good job on it."

Cas smiled at his older brother before placing it into his hands and asking, "Can you make it come alive please?"

Gently, Gabe lifted the bee towards him and using a touch of his grace brought the small animal to life. The other archangels all followed suit, bestowing life into their creations. The rest of the day was spent playing with the animals and playfully taunting each other on the shortcoming of each other's creations.

Little did they all know that this day would be one of the last peaceful and happy days in Heaven with the war breaking out soon after.

* * *

Gabe shut the door with a heavier heart then when he entered. The past had been so good. Everyone had lived in harmony. Everyone had been... happy. For so long now Gabe had stayed for only one reason. To raise Cas and Balthazar. But now, now they were older, they didn't need raising, they didn't need him. What else was there to stay for anymore? Michael and Raphael, who spent their whole day working, sealed in their offices? The rest of the angels, who ran around, paying no attention to him? Anna, who talked to him and offered him a smile occasionally? His father, who had deserted them so many years ago? There was nothing left. For a long time there had been nothing. Now, it was time to leave, to start again. To try and forger the past and create a better future for himself. One where he actually had meaning and purpose.

He would go to Earth. Assume a new identity. Start again. Become someone other than the useless, forgotten archangel Gabriel. And who would be left to care? No-one. Sooner or later, everyone would forget him. Even Cas and Balthazar.

* * *

Gabe stood at the portal to Earth, checking everything before he took off for the last time. He stretched his wings. Adjusted his robe and secured his blade. Pushed back his hair and prepared for take off. Before leaving he took another look around his home, before he left for the last time. He felt a pang of sadness that he would likely never see this place or his family again but pushed it aside, preparing himself for a new, hopefully better life.

He would miss the beauty and the tranquillity of Heaven. He would miss his family. But what he was really going to miss were the memories. The memories of the good times when Heaven was happy and at peace. The laughs and jokes he'd shared and the beauty he'd seen. He would miss it all but he couldn't survive here anymore. He no longer wanted to leave. He needed to leave, to have a chance at living again.

As he was about to take off, he heard two voices calling his name frantically. Turning around, he saw two of the angels he still cared about rushing towards him. Cas and Balthazar stood at the edge of the field looking upset and close to tears.

"You were going to leave us, weren't you?" Balthazar said. He didn't sound angry or accusing, just upset and disappointed. "Don't try and deny it Gabe because you were. We found your note."

"Weren't you happy anymore Gabe?" Cas asked, "Didn't you love us anymore?" He pleaded, hurt evident all over Cas' face.

"No, please, it's not like that at all," Gabe begged, wanting them to understand, "Of course I still love you. I will always love you. You're my brothers. But, I just can't go on living here anymore. I'm so proud of both of you and I'm so sorry. For everything. I love you more than anything. Don't ever forget that."

With that, Gabe took a deep breath and threw himself over the edge, plummeting towards Earth, his heart breaking as he heard the scream of Cas and Balthazar begging him to come back, knowing that he had just broken the two people who were most important to him.


	19. Silence

Silence. That was all that was left. Cas and Balthazar stood at the edge of the field where Gabe had just fallen from. They stood side by side. In the still air. In silence. Neither was willing to move. Neither was willing to accept that their brother, their mentor, their friend had left them. Left them alone and afraid. There was nothing to do but stand and stare. In silence.

And so they waited. They waited to make sense of what had happened. They waited for someone to take control. They waited for Gabe to pop back up laughing saying it was all just a joke. They waited for someone to say "it's going to be okay." They waited. In silence.

Neither knew how much time had passed. How long they had stood there for, in shock. Neither could comprehend how everything was still going on. How the world was still turning when Gabriel had just fallen. How did no-one else comprehend that the world had just changed forever. How did everyone go on with their lives when it felt like everything should fall silent.

It was Michael who found them. Quite fitting actually that one of the angels who had both damaged and comforted Gabriel should be the one to find and comfort his damaged charges. He pried them away from the field and took them back to his office, asking what had happened even though he already knew. He listened to them with pain clawing inside of him and at the end of the story, they all sat in silence.

As gossip always does, the news spread and slowly but surely every last Angel in Heaven found out. And one by one, Heaven fell silent.

Down in the prison cells Gadreel and Abner fell silent, mourning the loss of an angel who still cared for and believed in them.

Through the streets of Heaven angels fell silent remembering the sound of Gabriel's laugh and the shimmer of his wings as he does overhead.

In her nest, Anna fell silent, remembering the kind archangel who had shown her the way home when she was lost many years ago.

Michael and Raphael fell silent at their desks wondering where they had gone wrong with their little brother. How they had missed that he was so unhappy.

And still, Cas and Balthazar sat in silence, remembering the brother who raised and loved them.

And far away from Heaven, God fell silent. His heart breaking as he saw what his plan had led his youngest archangel to. Out of everything he could have accounted for, he never accounted for the love or humanity his angels would find. And he hoped that one day, everything would be all right again. But for now, he sat in silence.

* * *

 **Note:** Hey everyone, sorry for not posting in ages. I forgot I hadn't posted this chapter and I've been too flat out with school to write anymore chapters but Chapter 20 is being written currently. Anyway, sorry for the awfully long wait but I hope you enjoy this Chapter! As always, let me know what you think!


	20. What's Left?

Slowly Heaven recovered. Angels moved on, going about their normal tasks. They remembered and grieved for the loss of the fun-loving archangel. But those who had known Gabriel the best could not seem to move on properly. Some hid it better than others.

Michael and Raphael retreated into their offices, hiding away from the rest of Heaven. On the outside, they looked calm, collected, respectable, but inside their heart were still breaking for the little brother they failed to protect

Cas and Balthazar stuck together most of the time. When Gabriel had left they had felt abandoned, alone, hopeless. Their best friend and guide had flown from them, leaving them alone, together.

* * *

At first glance, it seemed easy to tell who was most affected by Gabriel's fall. Cas fell into a pit of despair, weeping and refusing to do even the most basic of tasks.

But eventually, he started to improve. He started talking to others, getting out and living. Sure, he still felt the loss of his brother as heavily as ever but slowly he learned to deal with it.

To keep living like Gabe would have wanted him to do.

* * *

On the other hand, Balthazar seemed to recover in no time at all. Within a couple of days, he was searching for work. Searching for something, anything to do. He worked harder than nearly any other angel because when he worked he could deal with the loss, he could ignore it.

But it was when he stopped working that the memories, the nightmares came flooding in.

He didn't let Cas see how much he was suffering. His younger brother was still trying to recover as well. In fact, he didn't let anyone see how much he was suffering. They had all moved on. No-one would care that he was barely coping. That he was drowning with his head only just above the water.

So he hid what he felt. He hid how betrayed, how alone how scared he was. How, without his older brother, there was nothing much left for him.

* * *

 _"_ _I'll never leave you, I promise."_

 _"_ _You promise Gabe?"_

 _"_ _Yes. So long as I live I'll always love you and I'll never leave you, Balthazar."_

* * *

So much for promises, Balthazar thought. Gabriel had said, promised that he would never leave them. Look at how long that promise had lasted for. Now, Gabriel was gone. He had left them alone with nothing more than the memory of the big brother who had loved and cared for them. All of Gabriel's word's, which had seemed so meaningful at the time, were they all just empty promises? Words said to comfort them while the archangel bided his time, waiting until he could be free. Was anything he said actually true? He had lied about never leaving them. Had he also lied about ever loving them? What was left of Gabriel was disintegrating in front of Balthazar's eyes.

* * *

As the sun fell on another day in Heaven Balthazar sat with his back against a tree, far away from all the nests where the other angels were settling down for the night. The sky was stained gold, the same colour as Gabriel's wings Balthazar thought absentmindedly.

How could everything still be so beautiful and calm after what had happened? Cas had dealt with Gabriel's departure. It took him a while, but he had moved on. Cas still had someone to look up to and rely on, but Balthazar had nothing.

He had tried to move on. To keep living. For Cas. But he couldn't move on. What was left to move on for after Gabriel had left? Cas had moved on, learned to live on his own. Made new friends and accepted what had happened. No-one needed Balthazar anymore. He was useless. He couldn't stand all the faces around him, constantly saying "I'm sorry."

* * *

 _What was left to fight for?_

 _What was left to stay for?_

 _What was left to live for?_

* * *

There was something to do. Something he could do to escape the pain in Heaven. It was a cowards way out. It was his last chance to follow in his big brother's footsteps. As much as it pained Balthazar to leave Cas, he couldn't stay in Heaven with all these memories broken like dying embers, as if from a dream he can't quite remember.

He needed to leave. But he couldn't do it in the same way as Gabe. He had hated the not knowing of Gabriel's death. Not knowing where he was. Not knowing if he was alive. Balthazar would make his leave final. No one would ever have any reason to doubt what he had really done.

He had always been good at deception after all.

* * *

Cas was walking slowly home after a day of work. Balthazar came home later each night, giving Cas no reason to rush home. The walk allowed him to think about everything that had happened. With Gabe leaving, Cas had felt lost for so long, but at least he still had Balthazar to help guide him.

As Cas neared the nest, he was thinking about how he could welcome Balthazar home that night and help him relax a bit, since he was always so busy. He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he didn't even notice he had reached the nest until he nearly ran into it.

Stretching out his wings, Cas looked up at his nest, preparing to take off. Suddenly, a drop of liquid fell down on him and landed on his face. Wiping it way, Cas dismissively looked at his hand, bringing it back up only when he realised that his hand now had a streak of red on it. Wings quivering, Cas launched towards his nest, hoping that whatever fell on him wasn't blood.

Landing in the nest, Cas looked around, breathing a sigh of relief at not seeing anything out of the usual. But as he looked down, he saw a small rivulet of red flowing from a corner of the nest. With shaking steps, Cas followed the stream, his mind seemingly having retreated to the furthest hidden corner of his head.

As Cas turned the corner, his breath hitched in his throat and his mind retreated further. In front of him lay the sight he never thought, no, never hoped, he would see. In front of him, lay the bloodied, lifeless body of his brother. In front of him, lay Balthazar. Pale, lifeless, bloodied.

All at once, Cas' mind came hurtling back to reality and he let out an ear-piercing scream which pierced into the hearts of all the angels in Heaven. Cas sank to his knees, beside his lifeless brother, tears rolling down his face.

* * *

Michael was sitting in his office when he heard Cas' cry. Instantly getting to his feet, Michael ran outside and launched himself into the sky, flying rapidly towards Cas' nest. Michael had only ever heard a cry like that once before from Cas, and that was when Gabriel fell to Earth, so he could only fear the worst.

When he landed in the nest, Michael's eyes instantly fell on the hunched over form of Cas. Slowly approaching Michael could just her the wracking sobs and soft murmurings of Cas, the two sounds seeming at odds with each other. As Michael reached Cas, he looked warily over and saw the body of Balthazar. As he recoiled slightly, Cas noticed his presence and turned around, his eyes swollen and his trench coat coated in the blood of his brother.

"He's gone," Cas chokes out, tears still streaming down his face. "He's gone and he's not coming back. It's all my fault and I'm all alone now." Cas sobbed t this realisation, bending back over his brother, blood soaking into his clothes, staining the tan fabric a dull, rusty red.

Michael pulled Cas towards him, trying to tear his eyes away from the dead form of Balthazar. "Shhh...it's not your fault Cassie. None of this is your fault. And you still have me. I'll look after you."

Cas sobbed into Michael's chest, "no you won't be. Everyone leaves me, Luci, Gabe Balthazar. It's only a matter of time before you leave as well."

Michael's heart broke at Cas' words, knowing nothing he could say could comfort the younger angel. Instead, he just pulled him closer and said, "let's go back to my office and we'll get you cleaned up."

Cas didn't want to leave Balthazar, but with Michael firmly pulling him away, there was nothing he could do except follow, leaving his brother behind him.

* * *

Michael showed the freshly cleaned Cas to a spare room in the archangels building. "Stay here and get some rest Cas," he said, gently leading his brother into the room. "Raphael and I will go and get Balthazar and you can see him when you wake up, okay?"

Cas nodded slowly, his tired, still red and swollen eyes already beginning to close. Michael ran his hand affectionately through Cas' hair once more before gently closing the door to the room and walking off.

As Cas fell asleep, all he could see were images of Balthazar lying in the nest with Cas standing beside him, helpless.

* * *

Balthazar quickly adapted to life on Earth. He adopted the partying, fun-loving persona of a French aristocrat and lived every day to the fullest. From the outside, everything seemed perfect in Balthazar's life. He had it all – money, parties, women. But he was still missing one thing he could never truly go back to. His family.

And so, Balthazar drowned himself in drink and drugs – a potent combination which let him forget about the life he left behind. But in the cold, dark mornings when he awoke from his drunken and drugged stupor, the memories of home came rushing in.

He remembered the cool blue sky which hung above Heaven in the early mornings. He remembered the flecks of light reflected from his sibling's wings in the whitewashed streets. But most of all, he remembered Cas. Out of everything he had left behind, leaving behind his little brother had hurt the most. He missed the way Cas would stretch out his wings, brushing Balthazar's face in the morning. He missed how Cas would turn his head slightly to the side when he was confused. And he missed the ever loving and innocent attitude Cas still had.

But he had fallen. He had left all of that behind. He couldn't go back to his old life, no matter how hard we wished he could. And so, Balthazar moved on. Never looking back. Never staying put. Always moving around.


	21. Nothing More

The sun rose on a morning which wasn't quite as bright as usual. The blue of the sky was more grey. The sharp outlines of Heaven seemed smudged. The golden sunrise was more muted. Cas didn't notice any of this of course. He simply sat in his nest, staring at the wall, in the same position he had been in for the past three days. His wings lying flat across the floor. His blue eyes dull and empty. His face pale.

Suddenly there was a gentle flapping of wings behind him as Michael landed in the nest. "Castiel?" he said softly, "are you ready?'

Cas turned around, his face expressionless, barely seeming to take in what Michael was saying. "What for?" he asked flatly.

Michael swallowed, not believing that Cas had forgotten, "you know Castiel…today is Balthazar's funeral", he said his voice dropping off.

"Oh," Cas replied turning back around to face the wall. "I don't think I want to go."

"But Cas, you have to go. It's Balthazar. He…he was your brother, your best friend. Sitting here isn't good for you."

Cas turned around, his eyes flaming, "I don't need everyone's pity, especially not yours. You left him alone. You left all of us alone. You're the reason he's dead and that Gabriel's gone. If you had been more of a brother they still would have been here."

Michael sighed sadly, feeling a twinge of guilt at the truth of Castiel's words, but he shook that off, instead grabbing Cas and dragging him towards the edge of the nest. "Maybe it is my fault Castiel," he said, "but blaming each other won't change anything. Just come today and then I'll leave you alone and you can go back to staring at the wall, wasting your life if you want to. If you won't do it for yourself or for me, do it for Gabriel and Balthazar."

Cas stared up at Michael, defiance still clear in his face. But suddenly, his body drooped and he nodded, following Michael out of the nest, without another word.

* * *

As Cas and Michael approached the funeral, a hum of chatter became clear and groups of angels dressed in black became clear. Cas suddenly became embarrassed realising that he was still in his tan trench coat and struggled to get it off, before Michael put a hand on his arm saying, "leave it on. Balthazar wouldn't mind".

Slowly the two walked towards the rest of the angels, Cas drawing back as the got closer. As they walked past, the angels all bowed their heads and stopped talking, casting pitiful glances at Cas. Once they had walked past, Cas heard the murmurs start up again, no doubt discussing his abrupt disappearance from the life of Heaven.

Cas hurried forward, casting his eyes downwards and drawing his coat closer around him. Michael placed a hand on his arm and guided him to a row of empty seats at the front. Cas sat down numbly, his eyes drawn to the black covered coffin laying in front of the rows of seats. Suddenly the world seemed to go silent, the muttering of the angels fading into nothing more then a distant buzzing as Cas stared at the coffin. His brother was in there. The brother who had protected him. The brother who had shown him Earth for the first time. The brother who had made him laugh. The brother who was no more.

* * *

Somehow Cas made it through the funeral, staring blankly towards the front, deaf to the speeches of the angels who claimed to have known Balthazar but couldn't have known him as Cas had. Eventually, when it ended, Cas got to his feet and hurried off, desperate to escape the pitiful eyes of his brothers and sisters.

He had no idea where he was going but it didn't matter. He just wanted to escape everyone and everything. Eventually, he stumbled to a stop at the edge between Heaven and Earth. Maybe if he fell he would finally be able to disappear. He stood there, expecting to feel scared but instead he just felt a sense of…emptiness. Despite wanting to leave Cas found that he couldn't force himself over the edge. His feet seemed glued to the ground. His wings seemed to be tied down and his brain seemed to have ground to a halt.

Suddenly there was a noise behind Cas. Instead of turning around, Cas ignored it, not caring who it was or what they had to say.

Michael stared at Cas, realising he didn't know what to say now that he had found him. "Cas," he started, "are you going to come back?". Cas didn't react, seeming not to have heard Michael. Taking a deep breath Michael continued, "you have to come back. Heaven can't handle another loss. It wouldn't help."

Cas slowly turned around, his voice and eyes deadened, "who cares what Heaven wants?" he said slowly. "I wanted Gabriel and Balthazar to still be here but we don't always get what we want do we Michael?" Cas said scathingly.

Michael suddenly saw red, forgetting that he was trying to comfort Cas. "You will step back Castiel. You will come back to Heaven. How dare you disrespect me like that?"

Cas appeared to ignore Michael instead turning back around to look over the edge. Michael lunged forward and grabbed Cas' coat dragging him back. Cas looked infuriated, scrambling to get out of Michael's grip. "Let go of me," he shouted, "I'm not coming back."

Michael glared at him, looking more like the fierce soldier of Heaven than Cas had ever seen him look like. "You will come back Castiel," he said coldly, "that is a direct order." With that Michael grabbed onto Cas and dragged him back towards the archangel building throwing him into a room, saying "you will stay here until you learn some respect. Be thankful that I didn't take you down to the prison." And with that, Michael slammed the door closed on Castiel.

* * *

Cas slumped against the wall, falling to the ground, his head in his hands. For the first time since Gabriel had fallen, Cas sobbed, mourning the life he had lost. And for the first time in an eternity, he bowed his head and prayed.

* * *

Note: Hey everyone! This chapter was going to be a bit longer but I decided to split it into two seperate parts. I'm going away for a bit so I won't be able to write, but I hope you enjoy this chapter. As always, let me know what you think!


	22. A Soldier is Born

"Again!" Zachariah yelled to the training angels. "You will do it again and again until you do not have to think about it."

Cas glanced around his fellow angels watching them. Uriel was a couple over, working hard. Anna was at the front leading another group. Bartholomew and Hester were in front of him performing the action robotically. Suddenly Cas heard a voice behind him.

"What are you doing taking a break Castiel?" Cas turned around only to see Michael standing behind him observing what everyone as doing.

"Nothing sir," Cas replied quickly, not eager to get into Michael's bad books, "I was just about to do it again."

"Well then," Michael said, "let's see you do it. Akobel, come here. Cas can demonstrate with you."

Cas felt his stomach drop. Akobel was a seraphim and Cas was just a normal angel. One with natural fighting skills but a normal, lowly trained angel nonetheless. Akobel however, nodded obediently and walked over to Cas, immediately getting into stance. Cas suddenly felt a calm, determined feeling wash over him. If Michael wanted him to fight, then he would fight.

Akobel and Cas circled ach other slowly, both taking in each other but suddenly Cas leapt, surprising Akobel and, after a brief struggle, pinning him to the floor, disarmed. A silence filled the training hall as Michael struggled with what had just happened. Cas stood up slowly, looking Michael dead in the eye waiting for the rude remark which would come from his once so caring brother.

Instead, Michael just nodded and turned away saying, "Well, what are you waiting for? Keep training!"

Cas turned around to Akobel who was just getting off the floor. "Are you alright?" he asked.

"I'm fine," Akobel replied, "but you are a very good fighter Castiel. It would not surprise me if you become garrison leader one day. Why you are not a seraph, I don't know."

Cas swallowed, shocked by what Akobel had said. Him, a garrison leader and seraphim. It wasn't possible. Cas smiled weakly said, "thank you Akobel and sorry for getting you on the ground like that." Akobel just smiled and nodded walking away to where he had been before.

For the rest of the day, Cas trained in a daze, doing things automatically and without thinking. He knew he shouldn't get his hopes up, but he couldn't help but wish to be a garrison leader, or even a part of a garrison simply to escape the mundaneness of training every day.

* * *

Years, or maybe centuries, Cas had stopped counting, later he got called into Michael's office. As he approached, he felt not the joy he used to feel, nor the fear he expected to feel. Instead, he felt...Nothing. He no longer cared. Now all he could care about was being a soldier, of following orders. The doubts which crept in during the darkest time of the night had no place during the day. Cas walked up to Michael's office and rapped smartly on the door three times.

"Come in!" a voice said. Cas pushed open the door and walked into Michael's office.

"Castiel," Michael said flatly, "do you know why you are here?"

"No sir," Cas said, standing up straight.

"Zachariah has informed me that you have been making great progress in training and he believes it is time to assign you to a garrison." Michael said all of this as if reading directly off a set of notes. "You will be assigned to Ishim's garrison and you will be under his control and will report directly to him. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir," Cas replied, his voice not revealing the joy he felt at being promoted to a garrison.

"You will report to Ishim tomorrow morning and tell him that you have been assigned to his garrison. Do you understand?"

"Yes sir."

"Then you may go Castiel. Do not disappoint us with this early selection," Michael said harshly, "remember that you serve Heaven."

"Yes sir," came Cas' reply once more, before he turned and walked out the door, shutting it behind him.

Cas walked away in a daze. He was finally out of training. He was finally a part of a garrison, and Ishim's garrison no less. Cas headed back to his best to prepare for the next day, desperate to impress Ishim and to prove that he was not the weak, young angel everyone thought he was.

* * *

The next morning Cas woke early and dressed in his usual training clothes, pausing to smooth out his wings and hair. Once dressed, he leapt out of his nest and hurried through the cool, still partially dark streets of Heaven towards the building where all the garrisons met.

When he arrived, he raised his hand and knocked three times on the door before standing back and waiting to be let in. He heard a noise behind the door and the sound of it being unlocked and he straightened himself up, desperate to make a good impression. As the door opened, a friendly face popped out. "Anna!" Cas said, relaxing his stance, "it's so good to see you."

Anna smiled widely, "you too Cas! What are you doing here?"

"I've been assigned to Ishim's garrison," Cas said proudly, "today is my first day."

Anna opened the door fully and gestured him in saying, "well I guess you had better come in then and I'll show you the way to Ishim. You don't want to be late for your first day," she said with a warm smile.

Cas smiled back and hurried into the building, waiting for Anna to close the door. "So," she said, "Ishim's garrison?"

"Yes," Cas replied, "Michael told me yesterday that he had assigned me to that one."

"Well it's great that you're now part of a garrison," Anna said, "but I wish you could have been put in mine. We could use a good soldier like you. But Ishim is one of the best garrison leader's in Heaven, so it's a privilege being assigned to him. But if you ever want to change, my garrison is always open to you."

Cas smiled at her, "thanks Anna," he said before falling into thoughtful silence.

For a while, the only sound was their footsteps along the hallway, before they stopped at a doorway and Anna cleared her throat, "this is it. Ishim's garrison."

Cas looked at Anna and managed to produce a strangled smile, "thanks," he said, "wish me luck."

She smiled back at him, "you don't need it. You'll be great."

Cas nodded dubiously, before taking a deep breath and pushing the door open.

* * *

"Everyone," Ishim's voice called out firmly, "This is Castiel. He is the newest member of our garrison. Benjamin, I want you to teach Castiel the ropes." Benjamin nodded once, acknowledging Ishim's words. He continued, "the rest of you, continue with your normal work. Okay, dismissed." Two other angels who Castiel had seen around Heaven but had never really talked to, walked off chatting to each other and Ishim walked back into his office. Benjamin and another angel walked over to Castiel, who was still standing where he had been when Ishim had introduced him to the garrison.

Benjamin smiled when he reached Castiel. "Castiel," he said, extending his hand, "I'm Benjamin." Cas shook his hand, smiling back.

The angel next to Benjamin extended his hand as well saying, "And I'm Mirabel. Is this your first time in a garrison."

Cas nodded, "Yes. I was just told by Michael yesterday that I was being put in this garrison, so I'm not really sure what I have to do."

Benjamin and Mirabel smiled, with Benjamin speaking up, "that's okay. We were all new once. We'll show you around and teach you the ropes. From what I've heard you'll be a natural."

Cas forced a smile and hoped that what they had said about him being a natural was true.

* * *

"Hey Cas," Benjamin called out, "we've got a new mission."

Cas and Benjamin had become quite close in their garrison. They were both gifted soldiers, although Benjamin was a lot more careful than Cas. Not that they really had anything to be careful. For a while now, they had not, except for in a few special circumstances, been allowed to go to Earth. Their mission instead was to observe from Heaven and to keep Heaven running and functional. "What is it Benjamin?" Cas asked.

"It's an exciting one," Benjamin replied, "we get to go down to Earth finally."

Cas was slightly shocked, an entire garrison going down to Earth was practically unheard of. It must be something pretty important. "Really?" Cas replied, "what do we have to do?"

Benjamin opened his mouth to reply, but before he could say anything Ishim had come out of his office and called everyone to attention.

"Everyone," he said, "we have a new important mission to carry out tomorrow. It will involve something most of you have not done before. We will be travelling down to Earth to deal with an issue." At this statement, there was a bit of excited chatter but it died down quickly when Ishim started speaking again. I want all of you to go home and prepare for tomorrow. We will meet here early tomorrow morning and I will brief you on what our mission is when we reach Earth." Cas started to move off with everyone else but stopped when Ishim called out, "Castiel. Could I have a word with you in my office." Cas turned around and followed Ishim into his office, shutting the door after him and sitting down.

Ishim scrutinised Castiel before saying, "I want you to be my deputy during tomorrow's mission Castiel. Are you prepared to take on that role."

Cas felt honoured and agreed instantly. He had never imagined that he would be asked to be a deputy on a mission to Earth under Ishim.

Ishim nodded. "Good. Now that you are my deputy I want to brief you on what our mission is."

Cas nodded, leaning forward to listen. Ishim started speaking again, "It has come to Heaven's attention that a Nephilim has come to be, fathered by the seraphim Akobel who was sent to Earth to observe the humans. Our mission is to punish Akobel and to get rid of the Nephilim before it can wreak havoc on Earth."

Cas sat back in shock, "a Nephilim? You're sure?"

Ishim nodded seriously, "father had wings, mother's a primate. And this child has a human soul mixed with angelic grace. Now that's-"

"Dangerous," Cas interrupted. "Aren't Nephilim forbidden by the oldest laws in Heaven?"

"Yes," Ishim replied, "So we must eliminate the Nephilim and unfortunately, we must also punish Akobel. Such a shame that the punishment for the only seraph in Heaven is death."

Cas looked shocked. He had to be a deputy in killing another angel. "Death?" he asked tentatively, "are you sure that is the only punishment?"

Ishim nodded gravely, "yes. I do not set out the rules of Heaven, I only follow them and that is what the rule against Nephilim states."

Ishim stood up, ignoring the shock which must be evident on Cas' face. "I will see you tomorrow morning Castiel. Go home and get some rest. It will be a big day for all of us." And with that, Ishim walked out, leaving Cas in the silence which had followed the revelation that he must assist in killing another angel, one of his brothers.

* * *

The next morning the garrison met outside of the building before Ishim led them solemnly towards to portal to Earth. Castiel already had a bad feeling about this missions, starting with the fact that he had to take the same fall Gabriel had from Heaven and leave from the same place where he had broken his wings. Before too long, they had reached the portal and one by one they launched themselves into it. Cas was all too familiar with the psychedelic, warp-speed flight to Earth and instead focused on what their mission entailed trying to comfort himself with the fact that he was simply following the laws of Heaven.

After an eternity, or so it seemed, they arrived on Earth and around him Castiel heard noises of both surprise and disgust. Behind him he heard Benjamin ask, "why are we on Earth? It's so wet?"

Mirabel sniped back at him saying, "Stop complaining Benjamin. We're here for a mission and then we can go back to Heaven."

Castiel, although usually enraptured with Earth and humanity simply felt sick to the stomach with what he was about to do. Before long they landed inside some tress, with an opening to a field with a house present. Ishim looked around to check whether they were all present.

"Okay," he said as he looked at them, "we're here today because one of our fellow angels, the seraphim Akobel, has taken a human wife. They also have a small daughter. A Nephilim."

Benjamin complained again, "we jumped down here for a kid?"

Ishim retorted, saying "Nephilim grow up. They grow into their power and then entire worlds die."

All of the angels nodded, understanding why. Cas looked around at all of them, amazed that none of them had raised an object apart from the fact that they thought this mission was below them. But after all, Cas had raised no objection when Ishim had told him about the mission.

Before Cas could say anything else, Ishim was instructing everyone to continue towards the house. Cas hung back, bringing up the tail of the group, hoping desperately that the mission would be called off.

There was no such luck however, as Akobel and a female walked out of the door. The woman, after seeming to plead with Akobel turned and rushed back inside. Akobel turned to the group of angels, a stony expression on his face. "You have no business here," he stated.

Ishim seemed surprised, "me? You were sent here to observe humanity. But instead, you took up with a filthy animal."

Cas felt a sudden flare of anger at these words. Humans were not animals in his mind. Sure they had flaws, but most of them are good and true. And after all, their one mission was to love humanity above all else. Suddenly, Cas began to doubt their mission but he couldn't pull out now. He couldn't let Ishim, his garrison, Heaven down. He had to do this.

Suddenly, Benjamin and Mirabel produced their angel blades and a short fight broke out between them and Akobel. But before long, they overpowered Akobel and held his arms. Cas knew this was his moment. The moment he must step forward and sentence a brother to death. A thought niggled at the back of Cas' mind. Surely there was some other way. Surely his father wouldn't want them to kill each other. Ishim, as if sensing his hesitation, questioningly said, "Castiel?"

Cas nodded and took a deep breath, stepping forward and looking into Akobel's face. Flatly, he stated, "Akobel, Seraphim of the Sixth Choir, you have lain with a human and you have fathered a Nephilim."

Akobel looked confused, "what?" he blurted out. Ishim stepped forward and grabbed his throat, preventing him from saying anything else.

"Continue," Ishim barked.

Cas nodded and continued reading, a knot of guilt and doubt forming in his stomach, "You have broken our most sacred oath, and the penalty is…death." Akobel's eyes widened for a second taking in what had just happened, but he didn't have time to say anything as Mirabel stabbed him in the stomach. A blinding blue light shone out from where Akobel had been stabbed and when it faded, he fell to the ground leaving nothing but a set of burnt wings on the ground. Cas stared numbly at the body, not hearing what Ishim was saying. All he could think was that he had murdered a brother. He had betrayed his family. As he came to his senses again, he heard a yelling from inside the house.

"No! No! Stay away from my daughter," Cas heard a woman yell, before he heard the scream of a young girl and just like that, Cas knew the Nephilim had been killed. They had saved the world, but at what price? They had killed their family and a child. They had broken the heart of a human. Cas couldn't stand the pain and guilt which was ripping him apart and he turned back the way they had come, saying to the other angels that he was leaving to go back early.

As Cas flew back, all he could hear was the scream of the young girl they had just murdered. No matter how proud he was of being made a deputy to Ishim, he couldn't do this. He couldn't stay with a garrison which was required to kill humans and angels alike.

* * *

Michael looked up when he heard a banging on his door. "Come in," he called irritably.

Through the door marched a dishevelled Castiel, all formalities apparently forgotten. "I'm sorry to bother you sir but I am requesting an urgent change to a different garrison."

Michael looked startled at this, "why do you want to change garrisons Castiel? I was under the impression that you were happy and doing well in Ishim's garrison."

Cas looked straight ahead, not daring to meet Michael's eyes, "I was happy sir but a recent incident has made me realise that I need to change garrisons. I am requesting to be moved to Anna's garrison as she has stated that she is willing to take me."

Michael looked taken aback for a second but recovered quickly and nodded, "I will contact Anna and check that she is willing to take you. In the meantime Castiel, I will notify Ishim of your leaving from his garrison."

Cas nodded, saying, "thank you sir," before turning around and leaving, closing the door firmly behind him.

As Cas left, his breathing slowed and he let out a shaky sigh of relief at the thought that he would never have to kill one of his brothers again. But just as suddenly as he had felt relieved, he suddenly felt overcome with emotion. Hurrying out of the building, he took off into the air and flew hurriedly to his nest, the tears threatening to fall from his eyes blurring his vision.

When he landed, Cas sunk down to his knees and sobbed openly. He had betrayed himself. He had promised that he would never hurt his family, but today he had shattered that promise. Because of him Akobel, the seraphim who had inspired him to be in a garrison, was dead. Although Cas had not been the one to hold the knife, he had issued Akobel's death sentence. Cas tried in vain to stop crying, but eventually gave up, waiting for his cries to stop themselves, taking the pain each cry brought as punishment for what he had done. For what he would never be able to undo. For what he hoped to never do again.

* * *

Cas sat in his new garrison, chatting with the other angels as they fulfilled their single mission, to watch over humanity. Cas was happy in this new garrison – it was peaceful. For him, watching humanity never got old. At that point, Anna came out of her office and called everyone around to her. "Alright, everyone," she said, "I've got an announcement to make. As some of you know, I've been thinking about making a deputy for this garrison since nearly everyone else has one. And I've decided to make Castiel my deputy."

Cas sat there, looking stunned at this news. He had been a deputy before, for that one awful mission in Ishim's garrison, but he hadn't expected to become a deputy so soon in this new garrison. Suddenly, there was a rush of noise as everyone stood up reaching over to congratulate Cas. He looked over to Anna and she smiled warmly at him.

When Cas finally managed to break away from all of the other angels, he made his way over to Anna. "Why did you make me your deputy?" he asked, quietly.

Anna smiled, "I know I can trust you Cas. I know you're a good soldier and I know you will always respect our mission. All the garrison likes you and if I'm ever not here I know that they will respect your leadership."

Cas looked stunned and stammered out, "I-I don't know how to thank you enough Anna. Truly, this means a lot to me."

Anna nodded and pulled Cas into a hug, "I know Cas. And I know you'll do great."

* * *

One day, many years later, Cas was called into Michael's office. The years of being a soldier and deputy had softened Cas' anger towards Michael and now, they both had a mutual respect of each other, although Michael could still tend to be a bit haughty. On this particular occasion, although, Michael was being very formal with Cas.

"Castiel," he said, "I've called you here today on a very serious matter."

Cas swallowed hard. Surely he hadn't done anything wrong lately? He had been following Anna's orders to a tee and working hard in his deputy position. Michael, as if sensing this worry, gave a tight smile ad said, "don't worry Castiel. You have not done anything wrong."

Cas breathed a sigh of relief and instantly wondered what Michael could possibly be talking about. Michael pressed on, "it was discovered early today that Anna, your garrison leader, had left Heaven. In other words, she has fallen. As the deputy of your garrison, you are automatically in charge."

With that statement Michael emerged from around the desk and offered his hand to Cas, "Congratulations garrison leader Castiel."

Cas smiled, still slightly in shock, "thank you sir. I'm very honoured to be a garrison leader."

Michael nodded his head, "I think it's time you call me Michael again, Castiel."

Castiel paused for a second before saying, "thank you…Michael."

Heading back around to his side of the desk, Michael said, "You will now be in charge of ensuring that your garrison follows their mission. You will report directly to me now, however that should only occur if there is an issue. I trust that you will do a good job Castiel," he finished with a smile.

Cas nodded his head, perhaps too eagerly, "Of course sir, I mean Michael. I will do the very best I can to ensure that our garrison follows our mission."

Michael nodded, "Then you are free to go garrison leader Castiel."

Cas smiled at Michael and went to thank him once again before deciding against it and walking out of the room, his head spinning.

After all of the years of training, all of the years of following orders in a garrison, Cas was finally a garrison leader. Of course, he felt awful that Anna had left. The two of them had been close when Cas was little. How could he forget the time she looked after him when he got lost in Heaven? But his excitement and surprise at becoming a garrison leader outweighed the sadness he felt at Anna's leaving.

Now, all Cas had to do was make sure that his garrison was the best they could be. They would accomplish their missions perfectly. They would have a good reputation. They would stick together through thick and thin. And Cas was not going to let anything change that.

Or so he thought.

* * *

 **Note:** Hey everyone! Thank you so much for all the reviews people have been leaving! I've definitely been reading all of them and trying to get back to everyone. Sorry for how sad these last chapters have been but as you can probably tell, the story is coming to an end, although I hope to write more about the angels in different fics later. This chapter and the next chapter use some of the transcripts from the Supernatural episodes, in this case, it was _Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets_. The next chapter might be a while away because I am at work and then going back to school soon so I won't have much time between school, work and university applications. Anyway, hope you all enjoyed this chapter, and as always, let me know what you think!


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